Belo News

BLOODY 'ELL 'UNDRED EXTRAVAGANZA!

From left to right, Easty, Wishbone, Vladimir the Impaler, Toesetter, B-Rod, Zyckmann, Yeti Boy, Wildman,
Dr. Dave, Hoosier boy, Sharkman, Sasquatch, Gazelle Girl, Shonger and Ranger Rick!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY YETI BOY!

CONGRATULATIONS TO SQUEAKY ON HIS RETIREMENT!!!

VLADIMIR THE IMPALER??!

Vlad the Impaler!

THIS SATURDAY, UGLY JERSEY DAY ON SOUTH ROUTE!!! IS THIS A GREAT COUNTRY OR WHAT?!?

Belo News
July 28, 2018

Zyckmann Estate, Mi. - As dawn broke bright and beautiful over the lavish estate of cycling legend, the Zyckmann (or a spelling close to that) we find the legend readying the Estate for the onslaught of Shark Minions who will descend on his Gull Lake home for the Annual, Bloody 'Ell 'Undred or affectionately known as the BEU!

It could not have been a more beautiful, picture perfect day for a romp up to that Shark Minion favorite haunt, the Walldorf!

It was also a special morning as two celebrity riders were there for the start and a virgin Minion who took part in the ride and got named on the same day!

Gazelle Girl getting photos
with Squeaky watching!

Squeaky and Easty rode in separately to wish the Nation a great ride! Squeaky also announced that he would be retiring on the following Friday and would be able to ride with the Nation more often! Congratulations Squeaky on your well deserved retirement!

Easty had another engagement, but wanted to get a ride around the lake in before heading out, so he stopped in to offer his regards and to help celebrate Yeti Boys Birthday!

Yep, it was Yeti Boys Birthday and he brought a cake for all to enjoy! This was one of those "special" birthday's with a 0 in it! Oh, the humanity!

Despite being older, it didn't stop him from destroying the course later that day.

New to the Nation was Virgin Minion, George, who, when it was learned his middle name was Vladimir, instantly became "Vlad the Impaler" which caused Zyckmann to give livid details of what "impaling" entailed. Oh, the humanity!

Welcome to the mighty Shark Minion Nation, Vlad the Impaler!

After a rousing rendition of Happy Birthday to Yeti Boy, the downing of Gazelle Girls artfully made deviled eggs and Birthday Cake, washed down with Bloody Mary's expertly prepared by Toesetter, the Nation was ready to ride!

Wishbone sporting the second best
jersey fo the day!

In addition to those Minions already mentioned, other Minions in attendance were Ranger Rick, Sasquatch, B-Rod, Wildman, Hoosier Boy, Wishbone (asking, "where can I buy one of those fantastic BEU Jersey's?) Dr. Dave, and Shonger! (see photo)

The lovely Marsha (Mrs. Zyckmann) was kind enough to take a photo of all the riders and at 10:10 a.m. - SHARP! the Nation pulled out of the station known as the Zyckmann Estate and headed out for one hell of a fantastic ride!

As the ride headed north and west, the Nation seemed to settle into a very brisk, but fantastic pace. The morning was cool and sunny, but maybe the best part was there wasn't a lot of wind to slow the mighty Shark Minion Train as it took in the sights of western Michigan.

Sasquatch, Toesetter and Ranger Rick seemed to take an early interest in setting the pace and teamed up to put together an extremely smooth ride!

This route is loaded with sights, all free, as the Nation moved pass farms and fields and then along Gun Lake up to the Yankee Springs area where the hills can be a major challenge.

Toesetter even braided his beard!

Just as they left Gun Lake and began to head into Yankee Springs, the Nation pulled into the Marathon Station so Gazelle Girl could call the Walldorf to put in the pizza order!

Is this a great country or what!?!

The Nation played nice and stayed together through the hills, making them much more easy and making the ride a lot of fun for all the riders. The Minion Code to "leave no Minion behind" was in full effect!

No Dick Banging was being enforced!

The Walldorf was ready and the Nation scored one of the best waitress in the annals of Minion/Walldorf history. The beer was flowing and the pizza kept coming!

B-Rod was not happy with the pizza selection in that he did not believe there was enough meat (apparently chicken doesn't count, or pineapple for that matter....).

Gazelle Girl noted that next year she will work on remembering meat for the cannibals in the group!

Sharkman was slugging down pizza like there was not tomorrow, hoping to absorb the Cobain he was chugging down. He does believe that Pizza is the perfect food. It has your crust group, your pepperoni group, your cheese group, your sauce group and if you drink it with a beer, your wheat group. Plus it is round so it has that whole "circle of life" thing going for it!

Oh, happy day! Yeti Boy bought the beer in celebration of his birthday and Wildman bought the pizza for no good reason at all! Is this a great country or what!?!?

Big thanks to Yeti Boy and Wildman for taking care of business!

Wildman got picked up by Mrs. Wildman after lunch as they were going to the Tigers game later that night.

Zyckmann working the crowd while Birthday
Boy saves his energy!

Sharkman will attest to the fact it is hard, at least for him, to get on a bike after a few beers......

The pace up to the Walldorf was a brisk 18 mph. The 22 mile pace back to the Zyckmann Estate was 16.7 mph with fewer hills! Oh, the humanity!

The mighty Shark Minion Nation pulled into the Zyckmann Estate at 3:10 p.m.! Enough time for Zyckman to down a post ride beer, shower and get ready for the wedding reception he would be attending at 4 p.m. just down the street!

The other Minions hung around for beer, bull and a general discussion how this might be the best BEU in recent memories! Sun, great temps, no wind, beer, pizza, laughs, ......it was a victory for America!

Huge thanks to Gazelle Girl and Zyckmann for putting this ride together again this and every year!

Shonger enjoyes a Bloody Mary while
Wishbone wants a BEU Jersey!

It was a fantastic day in the saddle!

You won't want to miss this weekends edition when all the BEU veterans will be buzzing about the great ride the previous week!

It has been named "Ugly Jersey Day!" Since it was rained out two weeks ago, we bring it back despite the fact Nike Boy doesn't own any ugly kit!?! Oh, the humanity!

He'll just have to muddle through......

That's right Bunkie! Get out that jersey you hate, is ugly or whatever. The Minion with the ugliest jersey gets to buy Sharkman's koffee! This is a great country!

It is also Shermanator Weekend, so the Nation will head to the South Route with Sharkman pointing out all those fantastic sites in central Kalamazoo County! Only $.50 a site (no change).

Can you feel the excitement?

Huh, can you?!

B-Rod and Wildman talking ride strategy.

Saturday, August (wait, ...what? Is it August already!) 4, 2018!

Ugly Jersey Day! South Route!

Launch Time - 8:00 a.m. - SHARP!

Be there!