Wednesday, July 31, 2019

ZYTCHMOEN STYLE?!?
Zytchmoen Style!

SHARKMAN IN WAM KIT!

SUPER TROOPER TAKES TAPE!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY HEARD ON THE CHAMPS LE GALESBURG?!!

MINIONS RETURN!!!

BEU IN A WEEK! HAVE YOU RSVPed YET?



SOUTH ROUTE THIS SATURDAY! OH, THE HUMANITY!


All the WAM jersey's were up at the WAM ride! Oh, the humanity!
But don't the Minions look great!?!

SHARK MINION JERSEY DAY!

STYKER GUY AT WAM!!!

Belo News
July 27, 2019

Shark Cove, Mi. - As dawn broke over the Shark Cove, our intrepid hero, the Sharkman was excited to get his WAM Kit on and ride! It looked like perfect weather was in the mix and he had no idea of what awaited him as he donned his WAM Jersey and Team Taylor socks!
Just look at this guy!

No need to check the radar on this Saturday, as it was bright and warm as the garage door lifted and the old Shark saw his wing man, Yeti Boy, riding up with a backpack loaded with raisin bread to celebrate his birthday!

Is this a great country or what?!?

As the two exchanged pleasantries, two riders approached who were not immediately recognized, silhouetted against the rising sun.

Then our hero realized it was long, lost Mad Dog back in the Nation!

Oh, the humanity!

He was accompanied by none other than Super Trooper! They had met up on the road and ridden in together.

As the four riders approached the Helmer Road crossing, they had not seen Reb. Sharkman suggested they cross Helmer and give the tardy rider a few minutes. However, as they crossed, they observed the late rider waving frantically from the I-94 bridge as if to say, "wait for me! wait for me!"

There was a lot of chatter in the group as they all caught up with Mad Dog and Yeti Boy, as Yeti had missed a few Saturday's as well.
Fabio even had sandles on!
Oh, the humanity!

Yeti Boy stopped as the group passed the Klutch, to drop off his bread and back pack (and as we learn later, his credit card).

At the start, Minions began to gather for the ride.

There were several Minion who were making their season debut or returning to the Nation after long hiatus's!

Tan Man, Kid Gallagher, and later, even Bob the Builder were all making season debuts! Welcome back, Shark Minions!

Brewman was in attendance, extending his ironman record on the season! Wow!

Sharkman was the only rider in WAM Kit. Wildman confessed he had not read last weeks edition of Belo News and probably was the only other WAM veteran in the mix besides Sharkman and Brewman.

Sharkman apologizes to Team Taylor and Team Eaton, as he should have had this Jersey Day a week sooner, but lost track of the weeks......(hey, he is retired). Sharkman pledged to do better next year!

Then it happened!
Happy Birthday Yeti Boy!

In what will go down as an historic moment in Shark Minion history, the man who brought you riding the Iceman with no seat one year and with a Camelbak loaded with beer the next, who introduced the Nation to a "woodie," who has shown up for mountain bike rides with an army helmet and aviator sun glasses, who continues to wow the Nation with his antics, speed and desire to be known as "Fabio," Zyckmann rode in, on WAM Kit Day, introducing what has now become known as  Zytchmaoen Style!

Zytchmaoen Style? Wait, .....what???

Yes, you heard that correctly, Bunkie!

Decked out in an Hawaiian shirt, shorts and sandals, for no reason what so ever, the legend known as Zyckmann wowed the crowd with his sartorial splendor!

When asked why, the Jimmy Buffett of the peloton stated, "Because I felt like it!"

Oh, the humanity! The Dude abides! You go Fabio!
Tan Man making his season debut!

After all the excitement died down, Sharkman confirmed there were at least 16 Shark Minions in attendance and breathed a sigh of relief, as his memory, like his hearing, is in major decline!!!

As the sound of pedals clicking in echoed throughout the school yard, Sharkman led his mighty Minion Nation out to their field of dreams known as the KK-TdG!

The Nation got stopped at the light in front of the Klutch and this gave the Early Morning Koffee group time to wave their adoration and for Andrew to get a count. Having Yeti Boys Bread in house may have indicated to Andrew a good post ride turn out!

As the Nation headed north, Sharkman tried to go back and welcome his returning minions to the peloton, but with close to 20 riders it was difficult to visit with them all as other riders, like PJ jumped on.

Tan Man and Super Trooper lead the group north and as Sharkman came up for his honorary sprint, Super Trooper pushed the pace up and challenged our intrepid hero. "What was he doing?" thought the Sharkman, who assumed he would hit the brakes as they approached the first sprint.

However, Super Trooper kept going and took the sprint!!!
Brewman extending his steak!
A WAM vet but no jersey?
Didn't read the blog?

The young Minion, when confronted with the major faux paus and the possibility of becoming Personna Non Grata, claimed he was unaware of the tradition, so the old Shark forgave him, immediately took the sprint win from him, and named hizzelf the winner of the sprint, capturing it at a new speed record of 27 mph!

Oh, the humanity!

The Nation picked up momentum as the fast moving train worked it's way through the col de Twin Lakes and the col de No Name, as well as the Yorkville Church, Kellogg Korner and the Kountry Klub section. The speed was well up in this section but the Nation, as it is wont to do, sat up at the turn for the run up to the Rt. 43 sprint.

As the Minions grouped back up, Hermster took an early flyer and attacked, opening up a pretty good gap, before a counter attack formed up and tracked him down just before the sprint. Sharkman congratulated him on a great attempt, commenting he went just a tad early. Hermster responded by exclaiming "I got closer to my goal!"

You go Hermster!!!

Doper led the group up the Col de Norte and Sharkman, not wanting to be left behind again, quickly got the train re-started after all the Minions made the hill and went up front.
Long lost Mad Dog returns!!!
Oh, the humanity!

The fast moving Shark Train moved through the Holy Rollers and on to the feed stop, where Gazelle Girl announce the pace line would be in a clock wise manner after the Digital Divide.

At the Food Stop, the Nation was surprised by another returning Minion, Bob the Builder, who was making a return and wanted to test his legs over the final section of the KK-TdG!

Welcome back, Bob the Builder! You've been missed!

After the Digital Divide, Sharkman and Yeti Boy immediately went to the front and started a two man pace line in the prescribed clock wise direction, per Gazelle Girls instructions.

Boatman, Sasquatch and Toesetter quickly joined on and got the speed up, but none of the other Minions seemed to want to join on the fun!??

The 5 rider pace line kept moving, while a clump of Minions followed in their wake.

As the sprint loomed ahead, Sasquatch, Toesetter and Sharkman came forward with Gazelle Girl on their wheels and like a well oiled Tour de France race team, led her forward as each peeled off after giving it their all, so that the "Sweetheart of the Peloton" slingshotted her way out to take the win as the crowd went wild in anticipation!

It was a victory for America!
Hoosier Boy was back to defend his
podium finish from the previous
week!

Sharkman shouted orders to ride safe and keep lines as the Nation crossed G ave. and started the run up to the finish.

Again, the Minions in the Nation didn't seem to want to move out front and it was left to Hermster to come forward. Falling on his sword, Hermster took the speed up as Shark Minions rode in his wake, looking for the right wheel to jump on.

As the Shark Train moved up the final ascent to the finish, looking like fly's on a wall trying to strategize when to make their move, riders started to come to the front. Tan Man and Super Trooper went first, followed by a cast of thousands.

As the Nation moved over the hill and to the final descent to the crown, Zoechkmoone flew forward, Hawaiian shirt flapping in the wind, like a pineapple bomb ready to explode!

Sharkman, seizing the opportunity and wishing he had his ukulele with him, latched on to the speedy Samoan and tried his best to hold on!

Super Trooper was leading to the end to take the sprint with Tan Man on his wheel! Amazingly, Jimmy Buffett had worked his way up to the final spot on the podium with the old Shark holding on

Kid Gallagher making his season debut!
Welcome back, Kid!
for dear life.

Then, Reb, pulling another "dick move" and yaking commentary, still thinking he is Phil Liggett (apparently from watching too much of the TdF!??) passed the old Shark just before the finish, taking him by half a wheel.

Reb made a failed attempt to file formal charges against Zyckmann, claiming his flapping Hawaiian shirt had hindered his dick move attempt to capture third, while Sharkman threaten charges against Reb for his dick move! Oh, the humanity!

It was a great day to be a Shark Minion in the Nation!

As the riders bunched up to head down the Champs le Galesburg, zipping up their non WAM jersey's for their sponsors, Sharkman led them in a rousing rendition of "Happy Birthday to Yeti Boy!"

"Man," Sharkman thought, "I wish I'd of thought to bring my ukulele!

Yeti Boy and Sharkman rushed into the Klutch and Sharkman tired to pay, but Yeti again, beat him to the line and had already dropped his credit card down when he had dropped off the bread!
A great day to be in the Nation!
Photo by Super Trooper!

Thanks Yeti Boy and Happy Birthday!

The grateful Nation chowed down Yeti Boys fantastic Raisin Bread with big smiles on their faces!

It was a great day in the Nation!
Gazelle Girl and the "other guy" arriving
with the sun on her shoulder!
















The koffee went late, but Sharkman was excited to have a full entourage on his return home along with a tail wind!

This IS a great country!

You won't want to miss next weeks edition of the ride, when, due to the Shermanator, the Nation will be doing the southern route! Oh, the humanity!

So if you missed the last time the Nation rode the Southern Route, along with all the sights, and the greatest down hill finish in all of cycling, this is your chance to ride it!

Saturday, August 3, 2019

Shark Minion Jersey Day!

Let's show off our colors south of town! Oh, the humanity!

Launch time - 8:00 a.m. - SHARP!
Bob the Builder back in the Nation!
Welcome back!


Remember to come to the start, as the Nation is heading south!

Be there!!!


The Shark in his WAM kit!










The Shark even had his Team
Taylor socks on!







Several attempts by Super Trooper to get a clean
selfie with the Nation!









Another!








Yet another!
group photos by Super Trooper

















Happy Birthday Yeti Boy!
Photo by Reb











BEU IN A WEEK! HAVE YOU RSVPed YET?


Belo News
August 10, 2019

Zyckmann Estate, Mi. - No one knows what he will be wearing, but the Jimmy Buffett of the peloton has got his RSVP in for that social event of the Shark Minion Season! Well, he better have, as he lives there!

Yes, it is time to ride the Bloody 'Ell 'Undred! All the details below, but make sure you get your RSVP in to Gazelle Girl ASAP!





STYKER GUY AT WAM!!!


Stryker Guy looking good in
his Team Taylor kit!
Belo News
July 26, 2019

Traverse City, Mi. - Stryker Guy was ready to rock it at the WAM ride this past weekend. Other Shark Minion regulars of Team Taylor were also in attendance and a big congratulations from all those that took part in this important ride! They had perfect weather for the event this year and the photos that have been posted on social media indicate a successful ride! Team Taylor has raised a lot of money for Make A Wish over the years and we congratulate them on another great year and look forward to seeing them back in the Nation so they can fill us in on all the success!

Congratulations Team Taylor and Team Eaton! You rocked it!







Riders joining the Minion rides acknowledge the inherent risk involved with bicycle riding and by joining any Minion ride hold harmless any rider involved.

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