THREAT OF RAIN DOESN'T STOP NATION!

The Nation ready to ride, despite threat
of rain!

GAZELLE GIRL STREAK BROKEN!?! OH, THE HUMANITY!

OH, YA, AND WHERE IS MAD DOG?!?

IRON HORSE JERSEY DAY THIS SATURDAY!

BLOODY 'ELL 'UNDRED COMING UP FAST!

BOOK REVIEW - DOWN HILLS DON'T COME FREE!

Belo News
July 22, 2017

Shark Cove, Mi. - As dawn broke damp and dark over the Shark Cove, our intrepid hero, the Sharkman, bound from bed and ran to the window to see if the predicted rain storms had arrived. The previous evening, as he was playing led uke in his band, Banjovi, out at Bowmans, he was watching the weather on the TV's above the bar, predicting an Armageddon of rain and storms predicted for his launch time!

As regular readers know, Sharkman hates those mornings when it is difficult to make the call. Call off the ride at 6:30 a.m. and the sun is shining at 8 a.m. Go, and an hour later it is raining like the waterfall on the southern route. Oh, the humanity.

Sharkman quickly went to the Shark Radar and as he sipped coffee with the green glow of radar on his face, he began to smile. The rain looked like it had passed and there was no sign of big rains west of the Field of Dreams!

Game on!

Anyone having information on the
where abouts of this Minion
should contact the Commissioner of
Cycling immediately!

The streets were a bit wet as Yeti Boy rolled into the driveway, but both riders were pleased that they were going to get their ride in!

No Nikeboy (he is a bit like Rainman) and no Reb this morning, however, Skittles, who was late, caught on to the two riders as they headed west on Michigan Ave. Interestingly, the rides noticed that they did not see even one car in the trip over to the start. They did have to climb the fence to get through the bridge but were pleased to be able to get through at all.

The three wondered what type of turn out they would find at the start but to their surprise, there were a number of riders. 10 Riders in all, though Ray of Sunshine arrived too late for the start photo.

All were surprised that the "Sweetheart of the Peloton" didn't make it to the start, but all were sure she would jump on en route.  Ray of Sunshine arrived as the train was pulling out of the station and missed the start photo.

In addition to Sharkman, Yeti Boy, Skittles, and Ray of Sunshine, X-Rod, Kiwi, Cuz, Bissell Boy, Brewman, and B-Rod were all ready to rock it on the damp roads.

As the Nation rode two abreast on their way to the start, the main chatter was "where is Gazelle Girl" and was her attendance record in jeopardy? That lead to, "where in the heck has Mad Dog been?"

Mad Dog hasn't been seen since 4th of July weekend and Minions discussed putting a Search Party together to locate the former expresso drinker and Minion regular.

Where in the world is Mad Dog?!!

Anyone who has information leading to the discovery of where this rider is need to report it to the Commissioner of Cycling immediately! Your Nation awaits!

Bissell Boy holding kourt at the Klutch.

We digress.......as the Nation headed north, Ray of Sunshine shared he was on his cross bike, as was Brewman, and therefore he did not want to mix it up on a hard A Group ride. Though he made this comment, and there was no A Group, the cross bike didn't seem to slow him in anyway!

Ray of Sunshine and Skittles led our hero out to the first sprint where the old Shark took a count of 10 total riders.

The group headed through the next sprint, the col de Twin Lakes and on to the Yorkville Church.

As the group was making it's way towards the Kountry Klub section, Cuz had a flat tire and was near the back of the peloton. This has been an unlikely position for the new rider as he has usually been in the front of the peloton. However, he shared that he was "on empty." When questioned he said, "No, really. I'm on empty. I had a colonoscopy yesterday and I'm empty!"

Unfortunately, the lead group did not hear the call, "mechanical" and kept riding.

X-Rod was on the job and rode like a mad man to close the gap and and notify the lead group of the problem.

Skittles did a lot of the pulling all morning!

After a while, Cuz and his support team were back and the ride continued!

Though not particularly fast (19.0 mph average) Sharkman stated he thought it was one of the great rides of the year despite the fact that both the "Sweetheart of the Peloton" and Mad Dog were missing. The pace was steady, the sprints were briskly contested. But everyone rode smooth, other than the flat there were no delays, and Sunshine and Skittles pulled like fast Thoroughbred's at the front for a lot of the ride!

 Through the Holy Rollers and on to the Inlet, the mighty Minion Nation rode!

At the Digital Divide, the traffic seemed lighter than usual and the Nation crossed as one and started their pace line, which also worked like a fine tune Swiss watch.

When it came time for Gazelle Girl to get into position, the Nation looked in bewilderment, but Sharkman declared her the winner of the sprint in abstentia! It was another "Victory for America!"

Brewman and B-Rod discussing strategy.

Ray of Sunshine and Skittles went to the front early to pull the Nation to the final sprint. As each pealed off, it left only Sharkman at the front and it always drives him crazy when he takes over and he hears riders behind him say, "slowing..."

Out of nowhere, Sharkman heard a voice, "I'll get  you to the top of the hill as best I can!"

It was none other than Sharkman's wingman, Yeti Boy, giving his all as a true Minion!

Sharkman was heard to reply, "I'll give it all I can but I'm spent!"

What, you might ask, are the two oldest guys in the peloton doing at the front, pulling the Nation to the final ascent to the finish? Sharkman and Yeti Boy didn't know either!

At the top, Sharkman thanked Yeti and went around him but it was not enough to hold of the cast of thousands...well, the cast of ten, who came around him.

The old Shark, after getting passed by most of the Nation, did get a second wind and got up to 5th place out of the 10 riders!

Meanwhile, at the front, Skittles led but suddenly, out of nowhere, Kiwi flew by to capture the finish ahead of Skittles, while we think B-Rod took the final spot on the podium.

Kiwi waiting for his
iced Koffee!

The fans went crazy on the Champs le Galesburg. Sharkman thought the threat of rain might keep the crowds down, but there were at least 3 people cheering our hero's on, which is triple the previous weeks attendance at the finish.

Seven of the ten riders stopped at the Klutch, where the locals asked the rider if they got wet.

Well, yes, but not from any rain, but from the wet roads. The Nation never got rained on and for the most part, the roads were dry. It was a victory for America!

Great discussion, koffee and camaraderie at the Klutch.

Fortunately for Sharkman, he also had Yeti Boy and Skittles to pull his tired dorsal back to the Shark Cove! Is the a great country or what?!?

You won't want to miss this weeks edition!

It is Iron Horse Jersey Day!

What, you don't have an Iron Horse Jersey? Well go out to Durango and get one! The Nation will also expect the President of the Western States Mighty Minion Nation Chapter, the Durango Kid, to wear his out in Durango when he rides Saturday (and we'll see if he is reading Belo News!).

That's right, Yeti Boy and Zyckmann, get those Iron Horse Jersey's out and wear them with pride!

Saturday, July 29, 2017

Launch Time - 8:00 a.m. - SHARP!

Be there!

THE BLOODY 'ELL 'UNDRED IS COMING UP FAST!


Belo News
July 20, 2017

Triple Nasty Ranchero, Mi. - The 6th annual Bloody 'ell 'undred is coming up! ALL the details are in the flyer included here. Read up, Bunkie! Don't forget to RSVP Gazelle Girl ASAP!

BOOK REVIEW - DOWN HILLS DON'T COME FREE!

Belo News
July 26, 2017

Gull Lake, Mi. - In an effort to class up Belo News, we include this in depth book review by legend of the peloton, Stryker Guy, who actually knows the author!

According to SG, the author, Jerry Holl gave up a lucrative career as a managing partner at Piper Jaffrey, bought a bike and camping equipment, flew to Anchorage and rode to Mexico!

The book is titled, "Down Hills Don't Come Free."

The book is about his trip and Stryker Guy, in his in depth review said, "It's good!"

That is good enough for us at Belo News! Where else can you get stuff like this?!? Is this a great country or what?!?

Attached is a link to more information on the book!

http://downhillsdontcomefree.com/

Stryker Guy gave it the ultimate rating when he said, "the author would make a great Minion!"

Nough said!


Riders joining the Minion rides acknowledge the inherent risk involved with bicycle riding and by joining any Minion ride hold harmless any rider involved.