FAST
TOUR OF CENTRAL KAZOO COUNTY!
CASH
ONLY DOESN'T WORK EITHER!?!
 |
| Tony the Tiger Jersey and one Corn Pops Jersey! Is this a great country or what?!? |
WHAT
THE.....?
THE
BLOODY 'ELL 'UNDRED COMING UP QUICKLY! GET YOUR RSVP IN NOW!
MINIONS
AT THE SHERMANATOR!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEBBIE DARK MATTER!
Belo
News
August
1, 2015
Shark
Cove, Mi. - As dawn broke bright and cool over the Shark Cove, we
could find our intrepid hero pulling on his arm warmers once again.
The Cove thermometer read 60 when the Sharkman dragged his dorsal out
of bed, but was reading 58 as he prepared to launch from the Cove. It
struck our hero that the past two seasons he has worn his arm warmers
for most of the rides over to the start.
 |
| Peugeot Guy returns! |
Good
thing Shark's love the cool weather! (Please note “cool” and not
“Cold.”)
As
Sharkman launched from the Cove, the Rainman Estate looked quiet and
there was no Mad Dog or Nikeboy. As Sharkman rode out, he reflected
on how he use to ride to the start solo for many years and it had
been awhile since he had made the trip alone. It somehow seemed
strange.
However,
he was pleased to see Mad Dog riding towards him as he cleared Helmer
Road and headed up towards the animal shelter. Mad Dog rode by to
make a U-turn, just as a rider came up on Sharkman from behind.
Sharkman, thinking it was too quick for Mad Dog to have made the
turn, quickly looked back to find Reb jumping on. Though he claimed
the Shark was early, and had to ride like crazy to catch up, Sharkman
told him the Cove uses and Atomic Clock and he is NEVER early and
NEVER late, but is always SHARP when it comes to time!
 |
| PJ with brother Bruce (name to be deterimed). |
The
three riders got to the start a bit early, all curious as to how the
turn out would be as it was Shermanator Saturday and a number of
Minions would be competing.
However,
as seems to be the success of the Nation the past two seasons, 18
riders rode into the start, with only a few in Tony the Tiger
jersey's, but many in Tony the Tiger “almost” jerseys! Easty,
Greyhound and Stryker Guy were all decked out in orange, some with
stripes, jersey's to commemorate the day.
 |
| Welcome to the Nation Bruce! |
Making
his season debut was Peugeot Guy! Welcome back to one of the original
KK-Minions!
Additionally,
PJ brought his brother, Bruce to introduce him to the Nation!
Welcome
to the mighty Minion Nation Bruce (riding name to be determined)!
Ranger
Rick was sporting a sweet new ride from Trek, living the motto, “if
you can't be good, look good!”
Easty
and Marco Polo were back in the mix after their triumphant ride across
Iowa at RAGBAI. Welcome back, you did the Nation proud!
 |
| The Sweetheart of the Peleton makes a grand entrance! |
After
a few photos of Pirate, Gazelle Girl, B-Rod, Sharkman and Zyckmann (who got
in the photo with the Kellogg's Honey Pops jersey), the old Shark
gave general instructions and also mentioned that all sites on the
day were “Cash Only” and “No Change” except for Easty, who
had a season pass.
Yes,
the Shark would be leading the Nation on the “Tour of Central
Kalamazoo County!”
Is
this a great country or what!?!
The
Nation snaked through town and waved to their fans at the Koffee
Klutch as they headed south out of town.
As
they approached the start, followed by Qman Hill, the Nation started
to kick up the pace. Zychmann made a move near the top of the hill
to take the sprint with Sharkman on his wheel and they were off to
the races!
 |
| Stryker Guy sporting his "almost" Tony the Tiger Jersey! |
Though
the “Tour of Central Kalamazoo County” tends to be a little more
laid back than the normal KK-TdG route, it was not to be on this
morning as the Nation seemed to be in a very frisky state of mind!
With
the sun shining bright and a gentle breeze out of the west, the
Nation was ready for action!
As
the fast moving train continued south to Hawk Alley, they turned west
and Tanman made a move to take the sprint in a spirited race to the
stop ahead.
Game
on! The gauntlet on the morning had been thrown down!
 |
| Ranger Rick and his new Trek! |
After
sharkman pointed out the Tiller's World Headquarters, the famous
waterfall and Cooks Cemetery, he battled with Zychmann for the sprint
and though he thought it was a tie, Zychmann said it was Sharkman who
got it. (Zychmann is a class act!). Sharkman claimed it was a tie at
best.....
The
sprints continued as Sharkman pointed out the Railroad House that
wasn't there anymore, the fairy tree house, the worst railroad tracks
in the world, farmers working on a farm AND railroad workers working
on the railroad all the live long day!
Dang,
can it get any better on a tour! Our hero knows how to tour! It was
like a travelogue on the Discovery Network! Who knew all this stuff
was there?!?
 |
| Sharkman trying to collect. "$.50, no change, cash only!" |
However,
Sharkman was getting no where with the cash only/no change program
and even had to buy his own koffee after the ride! Oh, the humanity!
As
the Nation toured through the “Epicenter of the Big One of 2015!”
in Scotts, Sharkman even cut prices in half as they went by the Post
Office AND the Beauty Parlor! But to no avail......
The
speed really picked up on the way to the MN Stop ahead sign sprint
and the Nation was ready to rock in the final sprint. The Greyhound
mentioned later that he had looked down at his bike for a moment and
dropped off the back and could not get back on a wheel until the
Nation got to MN! This was one fast group!
At
the MN stop, Sharkman cautioned the Nation that it was a fast down
hill finish and that the Nation needed to be careful to hold lines
and ride safely.
As
the Nation is aware, this is one of the greatest finishes in cycling,
with a major down hill and a nice turn at the end just before the
Stop Ahead sign giving the fans who line the course a very
entertaining finish.
The
Nation began down hill and was bunched up and moving at speeds of 39
mph as they went over I-94 and past the Galesburg Speedway.
It
was then that B-Rod made his move, looking like a runaway freight
train with dangerous chemicals on board! Look out below!
Knee
socks pumping like a little kid on a Big Wheel bike playing in his
driveway, B-Rod caught the Nation unawares!
Tanman
saw the move but was boxed in and B-Rod had a big jump by the time
Tanman got free. Sasquatch moved up quickly to cover Tanmans wheel
and Sharkman saw a chance and jumped on!
Tanman
made up some of the gap, but it was useless to try to catch those
knee socks, moving like pistons on a diesel engine! Yet Tanman,
Sasquatch and Sharkman would give no quarter!
As
the Nation rounded the curve at the bottom of the descent, Tanman and
Sasquatch moved closer but could not close the gap and the three
filled out the podium with Sharkman a close fourth!
Average
speed on the ride was 20.38 mph! Oh, the humanity!
Top
speed on Sharkman's computer was 39.8 mph on the descent! Oh, double
the humanity!
Others
reported speeds at over 40 mph on the finishing sprint!
Is
this a great country or what?!?
The
crowd's went wild on the Champs le Galesburg as the hero's rode in to
the Klutch, where Andrew was absent, but the koffee was still hot and
ready!
Many
of the Nation stayed at the Klutch for a while discussing the
attributes of the Tour of Central Kalamazoo County and one of, if not
the greatest, finish in cycling!
Sharkman
also announced he would again, miss next Saturday but would be back
for the Bloody 'Ell 'Undred the following Saturday! Don't forget to
RSVP for the BEU! (see below)
But
the Nation rides on!
Saturday,
August 8, 2015
Launch
Time – 8:00 A.M. - SHARP!
Be
there!
BLOODY
'ELL 'UNDRED AUGUST 15, 2015!
Belo
News
August
5, 2015
Zychmann
Estate, Mi. - The Nation is less than two weeks away from their
annual major extravaganza that no Minion will want to miss!
Though
the Sharkman has been gone a lot this summer, he will be riding his
first ever, Bloody 'Ell 'Undred and is ready to rock!
Oh,
the humanity!
But
is the Bloody 'Ell 'Undred, or better known as the BEU, ready for the
Sharkman? Yes it is!
This
annual event will take place on Saturday, August 15, 2015 with a
start time of 9:00 a.m. This is a casual ride, not a race!
It
is important to RSVP for this event! So get your RSVP to Gazelle Girl
NOW!
Joan.o@comcast.net
Be
there!
IN
OTHER NEWS!
Belo
News
August
5, 2015
Minions
at the Shermanator!
 |
| Hoosier Boy after his win and wearing a shirt! |
Hoosier
Boy was at it again this past weekend, representing the Minion Nation
at the Shermanator! Thankfully, he kept his shirt on as he won his
age group and was 9th overall in this annual event that
gives the Nation a reason to ride the “Tour of Central Kalamazoo
County!”
Additionally,
Stroker's daughter Kelly Slagh, won the entire womans race and
finished 13th overall!
Whoa!
Congratulations to Hoosier Boy and Kelly, you did the Nation proud!
Happy
Birthday Debbie Dark Matter!
 |
| Debbie, Zychmann, Sharkman and Gazelle Girl last year! Oh, how time does fly! |
Belo
News
August
5, 2015
Does
time fly or what?!? An entire year has passed since Gazelle Girl
gave “birth” to Debbie Dark Matter!
Happy
Birthday Debbie!
Riders
joining the Minion rides acknowledge the inherent risk involved with
bicycle riding and by joining any Minion ride hold harmless any rider
involved.
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