WHAT A DIFFERENCE A WEEK MAKES!!!
YETI BOY WITH COVID?! OH, THE HUMANITY!!!
VIRGIN MINION? SORT OF......
NEW TEAM SHRINK??
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| The mighty Shark Minion Naiton ready to rock the KK-TdG!!! |
FIRST "A" GROUP OF THE EARLY SPRING SEASON!?!
LOOKING DRY BUT BRISK FOR THIS SATURDAY!
Belo News
April 23, 2022
Shark Cove, Mi. - As dawn broke wet and bright over the Shark Cove, our intrepid hero, the Sharkman bound out of bed wondering who would ride over to the start with him.
On Friday, his wingman Yeti Boy reported in, stating that despite being vaccinated and boosted, he had contracted Covid! Oh, the humanity!!! (At press time it was reported that Yeti Boy is doing much better and should be off the DL list, making him able to ride next Saturday!!! Is this a great country or what?!?)
Yeti Boy also reported feeling pretty sick and if that legend complains, it had to be pretty bad.
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| Sharkman tried again, but cuts the ends off. Oh, the humanity, some stop him!! |
Then, a text came in as Sharkman was chosing his attire on the day. Reb was out, having kids baseball.
That left only Fire and Sharkman had immediate concerns she would ride him into the ground on the ride over without Reb there to complain, whine and hold the speed down to a reasonable level to protect our hero.
Though warmer, the morning temps were still a bit on the cool side and the roads were still wet/damp from the overnight rain. The type of wet that is just enough to throw dead worms and grit onto your bike and shins, but not enough to rinse it off. Sharkman hates dead worm carasses.......🐛
Sharkman launched from the Shark Cove on schedule and picked up Fire on Watkins a bit early on the day. Fire was anxious to ride and is really loving the new Ridley. We mean, come on, who wouldn't!!
Fire went easy on the old Shark but put him to shame in her short sleeve jersey, while the old shark had on a long sleeve under shirt with a vest for added warmth, which he took off later at the start.
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| The legend known as Stryker Guy! |
As they rode into the start, Brewman was already there as an unfamiliar rider was unloading her stead from her car.
The rider introduced herself as "Kim" who said that she had ridden once before with the mighty Shark Minion Nation but it was some time back, before Covid. Sharkman apologized for not remembering her and asked if she had been given a Minion name when she had ridden with the Shark Minions. She responded that she had not. Game on!!! More on that later.
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| The scar!! Oh, the humanity!!! |
Riders started pouring in as Sharkman tried to establish some order, trying to get the Nation to lined up and organized for the start photo.
Wildman, Hermster, and Greyhound all rode in around the same time with a grand entrance by that legend of the peloton, Stryker Guy hizzelf!!! It was his first long road ride after his knee replacement and he had the scar to prove it!!! Is this a great country or what?!?
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| Greyhound was back and bought the koffee!! |
Welcome back Bionic Stryker Guy! So good to have you back in the Nation!!!
Hoosier Boy was back for a second week in a row and apparently fighting with Brewman and Hermster for the attendance record on the year!!! 🥴
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| Brewman and Fire ready to rock it! |
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| Kim (SMNTBD)! Welcome to the mighty Shark Minion Nation! |
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| Hoosier Boy was back and riding strong!! |
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| The ever popular Wildman making his season debut!! |
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| Hermster was back, also in the mix for attendance! |
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| Skittles didn't get a solo start photo because....... he was late!!! |
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| Fire was thinking "Kim Possible" |
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| Thanks for the koffee, Greyhound! |
"SOFT" - "COLD" OPENING BIG SUCCESS!!!
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| The mighty Shark Minion Nation, minus Bissell Boy, who arrived a minute late!! |
THEY CAME, THEY BUNDLED UP, THEY CONQUERED!!!
GREAT WEATHER FORECAST FOR THIS SATURDAY!!
DRY AND WARMER! 🦈
COME ON OUT FOR "SOFT OPENNING #2!"
Belo News
April 16, 2022
Shark Cove, Mi. - As our Intrepid hero, the Sharkman, laid in bed with thoughts of winning sprints in a short sleeved jersey danced in his diminutive, shark like brain, he was so excited he did not need the Shark Alarm to wake him up.
As his eyes opened, he immediatly remembered it was a "Soft Opening" for his beloved mighty Shark Minion Nation!
After weeks of cold and snow they were finally going to ride!!! Though there was no snow to worry about, there was the small concern of .......the cold. 🥶
It was predicted to be around 37 degrees at launch time, despite launch time being set back to 10 a.m. in hopes of some warming from the predicted sunshine.
The forecast did not disappoint.......
As our hero padded down to the Sharkman Bike Shop in his basement, he began sorting through the wide assortment of cycling gear he had aquired over the 34+ years of Saturday Morning biking, pulling out all his winter "stuff" which is the technical term he uses for his cycling gear. There would be no "short sleeved jersey" on this day, though he has a record breaking number of them.
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| Sharkmans first attempt of the year for a selfie. Looks like he isn't any better at it.......😒 |
After accumulating all the "stuff" he thought he'd need and putting it on, our hero moved upstairs and then looked at the clock. It was only 7:30 a.m. and Yeti Boy would not be arriving to pick him up until 9:30 for the 10 a.m. launch.
Oh, the humanity!!! Our hero was anxious!!!
After having some coffee and explaining to Lava Girl that he had gotten ready way too soon becuase he was excited, he began pacing the floor waiting for 9:30 a.m. to arrive!
His Wingman, Yeti Boy was right on time as he drove in and Sharkman loaded up! Yes, finally moving on the day!!!
They drove over to Fire's house to pick her up and to see her new ride!!! Fire had ordered a new Bianchi, which is a brand that has some legendary status in Fire's family of prodigious riders. However, when she learned she would need to order it and it would take almost a year to get, she decided to instead order a beautiful Ridely (see photo)! It was so light, when Sharkman picked it up to throw in the Yeti's van he almost tossed it on the roof.
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| Fire on her new Ridely!!! |
Enough time to take the start photo and tell everyone that there would be no sprints awarded as it was "Spring Training" and would be a mellow ride. Well, that and the fact Sharkman wasn't exactly feeing in shape with his lack of saddle time. It was also learned that Yeti Boy brought the wrong cycling shoes, so was forced to ride not using the clips on his clipped shoes! Oh, the humanity!!!
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| Toesetter was looking particularly "Fetching" in his newly aquired "Minion Socks!" |
In attendance, from left to right (see lead photo) was Hermster, Gazelle Girl, Fire, Toesetter, Brewman, Hoosier Boy and Yeti Boy. That Legend of the peleton known as Bissell Boy, pulled in right after Sharkman put his phone away and he had so many "layers" on, determined it was too difficult to get the phone out again for another photo. Of special note was the rather fetching "Minion Socks" that Toesetter was sporting, in an effort to perhaps take over the role as "Style Guy" since Squeeky had left......
After the Mayor of Galesburg delivered a very emotional speech and yet another Key to the City for Sharkman, the sound of pedals clicking in could be heard as the throngs of 2-3 people shouted out a mighty cheer as the train left the station.
Is the a great country or what?!?🇲🇾
As the Nation stopped at the light in front of the Klutch, Toesetter put on a "Track Stand" Clinic for the Early Morning Group that was still enjoying koffee in the Klutch at 10 a.m.!!!
It was an extremely "mellow" ride as the Shark Minions renewed aquaintences and told their stories of what they had done all winter.
Toesetter was particularly "friskie" and stayed out front for most of the ride, taking a number of different Shark Minions with him on his wheel as he revelled in his Minion Socks.
As the Nation approached the Rt. 43 sprint, the saw the flashing red lights of emergency vehicles.
A motorcyclist had missed the turn on Rt. 43 and had hit a tree along side of the road. The mighty Shark Minion train was stopped as they ambulance was taking the crash victim off. Subsequent investigative reporting later revealed the motorcyclist was a 47 year old rider who was not wearing a helmet and was transported to a hospital in Kalamazoo, later listed in critical condition. At the time of this writing, there was no further information to report.
The ride went on and after riding through the Holy Rollers, the Shark Minions took the low road to the inlet, where everyone came to a complete stop before proceeding! 🚴🏻
The crossing at the Digital Divide went well and the first pace line of the year actually was pretty close to a true pace line. The Nation stayed together until the end when it was every Shark Minion for themselves as sprints were not being awarded.
As the Nation traversed this section, they saw a lone rider heading towards them that was readily recognized as Reb (aka Dickus Movemus Maximus). Apparently his sons baseball game had been cancelled (imagine...to cold to play baseball.....) and he had ridden over to meet the Nation. Reb picked up right were he left off with the "Dick Moves."
As the mighty Shark Minion train bore down on the finish, they stayed together until the final descent to the tape. That is when Reb, with Fire in tow, pulled his first "Dick Move" of the young season.
Sharkman shouted out to his loyal Shark Minion Nation, "track him down and pull him back!" To which Toesetter and Hermster responded. Toesetter immeditely dropped in with Reb and Fire while Hermster pulled ahead!
Sharkman saw his chance, getting some momentum from the descent, moved forward to complete a flawless "Dick Move" on Reb and his entourage just before the finish! A classic move that our hero said "just made his day."
The crowds on the Champs le Galesburg went wild! All 2 of them!!!
Yeti Boy, despite his having to ride handicapped with the wrong cycling shoes, managed to get ahead and pay for the koffee!!!
Thanks Yeti Boy!!!
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| The Klutch was rocking once again! |
The Press Conference at the Koffee Klutch went well as Barrista Ron poured gallons of Bottomless kups of Koffee to the chilled mighty Shark Minion Nation!
The forecast is looking spectacular for this Saturday so you won't want to miss the "Second Soft Opening" of the mighty Shark Minion Nation Season!
The start will be moved up a bit earlier to 9 a.m.!
Saturday, April 23, 2022
Launch Time - 9 a.m. - SHARP!
BE THERE!
Riders joining the Shark Minion rides acknowledge the inherent risk involved with bicycle riding and by joining any Shark Minion ride hold harmless any rider involved.
RIDE CANCELLED!!
TOO MUCH RAIN!It's like Mudman out there!!!
TOO COLD!
OH, THE HUMANITY!!!!
Belo News
October 29, 2021
Shark Cove, Mi. - After pouring over weather charts and the radar all day, the Sharkman hizzelf has cancelled tomorrows ride at the Fort.
Too wet, too cold......
Even if it stops raining, the Fort will be a mud hole. And the prediction is for rain off and on till 9 a.m. tomorrow morning. No fun in that......
Until next season, have a great off season Shark Minions and thanks for a fantastic summer of riding!!
Riders joining the Minion rides acknowledge the inherent risk involved with bicycle riding and by joining any Minion ride hold harmless any rider involved.
THE RIDE GOES ON!!!
WHERE WAS WISHBONE?!?
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| Studs of the peloton!!! Can Dr. Dave take a selfie or what?!?! |
BACK TO THE FORT THIS SATURDAY!!
IN LIEU OF ICEMAN RIDE/PARTY CANCELLED....!
WAIT.....WHAT???
Belo News
October 23, 2021
Shark Cove, Mi. - With a death in the family (one of the few reasons Sharkman would ever miss the call) it was up to the mighty Shark Minion Nation to pull a ride together on their own and without adult supervision as Gazelle Girl would not be in attendance either!
Thankfully, two of Belo News Ace Reporters were on the scene and able to report in....
The first was ace, on the scene reporter, Dr. Dave.....sending this criptic text message. After offering his condolences.......
"4 at the start. Joined before the Klutch by Reb and Fire. 43 degrees, dry roads, Opening Sprint defended by Fixit in Sharkman's honor!"
Talk about on the scene, riveting reporting!?! Is the a great country or what?!?
And a photo!!! Oh, the humanity!!!
Apparently Dr. Dave has been wasting his career options helping people get well and doing good in the world when he could, in fact, be writing for Belo News AND doing the selfie every week!!
Is that a fantastic selfie or what?!?
Ah, if only Sharkman had longer arms........actually, the least of his physical problems.....but we digress.
Next up was this phenomenal, can't take your eyes away, write up on the ride from Ace Reporter, Reb!!!
"Well before sunrise, Reb woke from a deep sleep with the sadness that neither our fearless leader nor his trusted wingman would be participating. Then he remembered that because it was just Fire and himself and neither one had the social obligations shouldered by Shark, they had decided to leave a little later, he hit the snooze bar and went back to sleep.
The plan was going great, until he rolled up to the “Firehouse” and Fire was still trying to figure out what to wear. Finally, satisfied with her attire, the two started towards Galesburg.
Both were a little sad that Butch and Sundance would be absent.
Not pointing fingers, maybe it was the leisurely pace, the wardrobe indecision, or Reb’s choice to hit that snooze bar, the two missed the start by a few minutes but met the four-person peloton riding towards the Klutch.
Greyhound, the senior minion, gave Reb the “8:00 a.m. - SHARP” look and no further words were needed.
The six-some, filled out with Dr. Dave, The Swede, and “Jeff”. (Fix it guy?) Not sure if Jeff has a minion name; but riding his gravel bike on 45mm tires at 40psi, he soon became known as “off-the-back”.
The pace was solid as the pack stayed together riding out of Galesburg. The peloton seemed content to not compete the first sprint until Jeff came from way back to capture the win. An effort that would have made Shark himself smile. The group continued north enjoying the ride. The only real issue was without Gazelle Girl, we had to overcome long stretches of awkward silence.
As the six riders headed south, they somehow became five with Dr. Dave being called away for a medical emergency. (Belonews is still waiting for confirmation on this one; our guest contributor might be working on false assumptions.)
The group finally got serious after crossing G Avenue and formed a pace line with four of the five thinking they had a chance.
The group rotated the lead with Reb floating to the clean-up spot and the Swede taking the lead. Greyhound locked into second with Fire tucked between the two big riders. With the speed picking up, Fire started to lose Greyhouse’s wheel and Reb moved up to third.
Patience was the theme as the Swede continued to lead. Reb, knowing he needed to go when gravity was his friend, pulled out of his third spot as the slope maxed out.
Aware of Reb’s love of the “dickmove”, Greyhound went, and went with a level of horsepower that left Reb and the rest of the peloton in awe, winning easily.
Greyhound continued his show of strength by buying coffee for the five.
While the Belonews doesn’t usually announce “rider of the day” and awarding the red number until mid-week, there will be an outcry if it isn’t the man on the Zinn bike.
The conversation was great as the five warmed up in the Klutch, but were left with several unanswered questions;
- Where was Wishbone? Wasn’t he the one that wanted to ride on the road one more week?
- Why was the Swede making Jeff ride an additional 30-50 miles before and after the Tour de Gull in preparation of the Iceman next month? Someone needs to tell Jeff it’s only a 30-mile race.
- What’s the plan for next week?
While the ride was successful; the tardiness, the limited participation, the lack of actual data, simply reinforces the need of a strong leader.
Viva la Shark!"
Whoa! Sharkman intends to put in his retirement papers after reading these two accounts of yet another great day in the saddle with the mighty Shark Minion Nation!!!
Oh, the humanity!
Guess it is time to move to the Fort for some mountain bike riding. Sorry Wishbone!
Though it still looks ridable out there this Saturday, the Fort should be in peak color and hopefully, dry! Well, that and the fact it is late in the year and the trails are calling and riders are getting ready for Iceman.
Sooo......
Saturday, October 30, 2021
Fort Custer Trail Head
The Shark Minions move to the mountain bikes!!!
Launch time from the trail head - 9:30 a.m. - SHARP!
Be there!
IN LIEU OF ICEMAN RIDE/PARTY CANCELLED....!
WAIT.....WHAT???
Belo News
October 28, 2021
Shark Cove, Mi. - The Sharkman had cancelled the In Lieu of Iceman Ride/Party as he will be attending and giving the eulogy at his Father in Laws Memorial Service on November 6. The following weekend, he will be heading out of town again, so the Shark Minion Nation will be closing down the regular season this Saturday.
A big thank you to the mighty Shark Minion Nation from the Sharkman hizzelf for yet another fantastic season!!!
Looking forward to next season already!!!
WILDMAN TAKES MAKE A WISH DAY!
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| Wet roads, but hot riders!!! Is that Rocketman over the left shoulder of Yeti Boy? |
BUSY WEEK MAKES FOR A SHORT BLOG!!!
BAD CLEAT SLOWS DOWN FIRE!!
ONE MORE WEEK! ONE MORE WEEK!
ANY JERSEY YOU WANT DAY?!?
BARRY-ROUBIAX FOLLOW UP!
LATE BREAKING NEWS ON "THE LEGEND" KNOW AS
STRYKER GUY!
Belo News
October 16, 2021
Shark Cove, Mi. - Our intrepid hero, the Sharkman, is having an unusually busy week, so we will forego the long story and cut to the chase!!!
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| Is that Reb, with Fire, in a cycling jersey? |
It was a cold and damp morning as Sharkman, Yeti Boy, Reb and Fire made their way to the start in Galesburg. Hoping to pick up Rule 24 Guy, they were disappointed as they approached the Eaton Plant.
Reb was actually wearing a long sleeve cycling jersey! Wait....what? Yes, it is true!!!
With the cooler temps (48 degrees as Sharkman launched from the Cove) and the roads still damp from an over night rain, the group was not expecting many Shark Minion to be in attendance on this late fall day.
However, and to their suprise, 12 riders made it in for the ride! Is this a great country or what?!?
Riders began pouring in, but only one two were in Make A Wish kit.....
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| Yeti Boy was dressed for the cold! |
Wildman was sporting his Team Eaton/Make A Wish jersey, while Sharkman was wearing a Make A Wish jersey along with, Team Taylor Socks, thinking that would give him a distinct edge in the competition. However, he was also wearing a very stunning wind vest that covered the jersey and rode in it the entire ride because it was, after all, a bit cool.....
Wishbone immediately gave the crown to Wildman with protests from Sharkman of the unfairness, but recieved no back up from his normally supportive Shark Minions. Alas, the title was given, begrudgingly to Wildman over the diminutive Shark's objections....
Rocketman made his usual late appearance, but was able to make the start photo. However, when the editors looked, they could not find Rocketman.....though it is believed that is his helmet just over Yeti Boy's left shoulder in the photo. The phantom rider!
As the Nation headed north of Galesburg, Gazelle Girl and Hoosier Boy led Sharkman out to his honorary sprint as he took it in fulll on, attack mode.
After wardrobe adjustments and crossing G Ave. the fast moving train continued on to the col de Twin Lakes were Fire developed a mechanical with a worn cleat. Actually, the entire toe section of her Look cleat was gone. Reb volunteered to ride back to the Klutch with her and would meet the Nation later for koffee.
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| Wildman took Jersey honors, and finished on the podium! |
Yeti Boy put in a huge pull after the Rt. 89 crossing taking the fast moving train past the Yorkville Church and past Kellogg Korner, where Skittles, Rocketman and Sharkman went to the front.
After the short "sit up" after the turn to the final sprint to Rt. 43, the speed picked up again, while Sharkman was enjoying the tow from Rocketman and Skittles.
As the Stop Ahead loomed up front, Sharkman decided to move up next to Skittles, boxing him in behind Rocketman, while then making a semi "Dick Move" by telling Rocketman to look to the right. Bang, .....Sharkman got the sprint!!!
He mentioned to Skittles, that probably won't work in the final sprint, to which Skittles simply said, "No, it won't...."
Sharkman led the Nation on and actually got about half way up the col de Norte before he was passed by the fast moving, Shark Minion Train. The group was moving so well, there was no stop at the summit of the col de Norte.
The Nation blew through the Holy Rollers, the Inlet (with a complete stop) and on to the Digital Divide.
After the crossing, Sharkman led the pace line for a short time, when Skittles, Rocketman and Wildman came forward to pull. Again, the pace immediately went up and as the group started to splinter, the front group seemed to be forgetting again about Gazelle Girl and was taking it north of 25mph!
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| The "Sweetheart of the peloton!" arrives to cheers! |
However, Hoosier Boy was there to help the "Sweetheart of the Peloton" to catch back on as the lead group, which had also splintered before Gazelle Girl came foward to achieve her crown at the GGG Spot Sprint!
It was a victory for America!
After the GGG Spot Crossing, Sharkman opened a good size gap as he wanted to spread out the field.
He was surprised that he was pushing 21-22 mph hour, but as he looked back knew that the Nation seemed too damn confident that they could reel him back in at any time. The unrepentented Shark Minions left him out there to suffer until the final ascent to the finish, where he was pretty much "finished" as Wildman, Rocketman, Skittles and school of Shark Minions went flying by him.
Our intrepid hero was able to get a second wind on the way down the final descent, and was actually able to see Rocketman, Wildman and Skittles take the finish with Wishbone a close fourth!
The paparazzi and tofosi went wild on the Champs le Galesburg wondering if this would be the last road ride of the season or not!
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| Toesetter even braided his beard! |
Fire was at the Klutch waiting for the Press Conference, along with her wingman, Reb. Fire had bought the koffee, for a grateful Nation!
Thanks Fire!
The party got rocking and the koffee flowed. There was another protest about the Make A Wish kit winner, as Sharkman took his vest off to show off his jersey, but to no avail.
Wishbone also put in a request to extend the road season, but Sharkman was thinking Fort Custer next.
However, special reporter Gazelle Girl reported that Fort Custer is hosting the "Custer Stampede" this weekend, so the Shark Minion Nation will stay on the road for at least, one more week!!!
Is this a great country or what!??
At press time, the forecast was for a cool but dry morning. If there is any rain in the forecast, watch your email for any ride cancellation.
October 23, 2021 - This Saturday
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| Skittles was ready after a high mileage week on the gravel! |
"Any Jersey You Want Day!" (you'll probably be wearing a vest or jacket anyway)
Launch Time - 9:00 a.m. - SHARP!!!
BE THERE!
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| Hooseri Boy arrived with extra tubes! |
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| Wishbone in his Make a Wish Chain Gang jersey. |
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| Rocketman actually made the Start Photo! Well, sort of..... |
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| Thanks for the koffee, Fire!!! |
BARRY-ROUBIAX FOLLOW UP!
Belo News
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| Raptor! Hey, BN doesn't think they've seen that jersey!!! |
October 2, 2021
Special Report:
Hastings, Mi. - Raptor did some major work to not only get some results from Barry-Roubaix, but some fantastic photos as well!!! Here is his report:
Sharkman, I know you made mention of some of the Minions that rode in Barry-Rubaix. I did not see a mention of Maid Marion who had an incredible ride of the 36 mile, taking 2nd place in her age division less that 1 sec behind 1st. Snow White also rode but not as a race, it was her first gravel experience and she cycled for fun and not time. Doing the 36 course as a beginner is quite a task to take on as an intro to gravel.
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| Snow White in her first gravel race!! |
I did the 62 mile Masters 51+ and Skittles the 100 because he must be crazy.
I will attach 1 Photo per e-mail.
| Name | Rider | Distance | Class | Time (h) | Pace (mph) | Place |
| Skittles | Bill | 100 mi | Mens Open | 6:39 | 15.05 | 103rd of 211 |
| Raptor | Walter | 62 mi | Mens Masters 51+ | 3:27 | 18.00 | 48th of 139 |
| Maid Marian | Cheryl | 36 mi | Women 46-52 | 1:59 | 18.11 | 2nd of 30 |
| Yetty Boy | David | 36 mi | Men 66+ | 2:08 | 16.88 | 9th of 38 |
| Snow White | Erin | 36 mi | Ride-for-Fun |
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| Yeti Boy in his Team Shark Minion Kit, kicking butt! |
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| Maid Marian leading the group!! |
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| You can always tell Reb! He's the one in the T shirt!! Leading the pack of lycra clad riders! Oh, the humanity! |
LATE BREAKING NEWS ON "THE LEGEND" KNOW AS
STRYKER GUY!
Belo News
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| The new knee! How will we beat him now?!? Oh, the humanity!! |
October 20, 2021
Richland, Mi. - As Belo News went to press, there was late breaking news that the "Legend" know as Stryker Guy had successfully survived knew replacement!
Wait....what?! The Legend had a bum knee? The guy who rode the Continental Divide from Canada to Mexico? Who rode across this great county, the US of A? They guy who kicks ass when the Shark Minion Nation is blessed with his presence?
Yes, THAT Legend!
Stryker Guy, hizzelf, reported in with the attached photo, "They chose not to cut it off! Should be ready for Custer next week?!?
Always self effacing, the veteran Shark Minion went on to say that "he asked that he be able to ride within 5 mph of Sharkman, Yeti Boy, Zyckhman, Gazelle Girl, Toesetter and Bissell Boy, the Lucky Ones, etc. his "alleged hero's" (Editors emphasis) to which the doctor simply replied, "I'm not a miracle worker!!!"
Glade it all went well and the mighty Shark Minion Nation will hold a spot in the peloton for you until you get back!
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| Styker Guy trying out a new ride! |
All the best from the mighty Shark Minion Nation, Stryker Guy!
Get well soon!!!
Riders joining the Minion rides acknowledge the inherent risk involved with bicycle riding and by joining any Minion ride hold harmless any rider involved.
SHARKMAN TAKES INTERNATIONAL JERSEY DAY!!!
TEAM ATHLETIC MENTORS TAKES SPRINT HONORS, AGAIN!!
SEASON HIGH TURNOUT!
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| Yeti Boy & Reb climbing to the Eaton Plant. |
SHARKMAN SAYS, "IT'S STILL WARM OUT THERE!!!"
YETI BOY INVITATION!?!
IS THIS A GREAT COUNTRY OR WHAT?!?
NEW START TIME! --- NEW START TIME!
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| The mighty Shark Minion Nation ready to rock! |
Belo News
October 9, 2021
Shark Cove, Mi. - As dawn had not yet broken over the Shark Cove, we find our intrepid hero, the Sharkman, down in his Shark Bike Room, picking out his "Internatinal Day" kit. Sharkman had developed the idea while naming Swede and was excited to be wearing his "Tour of Ireland" jersey that had been gifted to him my none other than that legend of the peloton, Stryker Guy hizzelf!!!
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| Maid Marion who finished 3rd on the day! |
Not only was he worked up about the jersey, but he had scored some Irish Shamrock socks on the Internet and was excited about their debut in the peloton. Though he had worn them before, this would be the first time in mighty Shark Minion Nation! (It is easy to get our intrepid hero excited, well, about almost anything......)
It was just a bit dark, foggy and cool, so Sharkman added arm warmers (one of the best cycling inventions known to humanity) and was ready when Yeti Boy rode up sporting his South African Jersey, which he actually purchased IN South Africa! Why didn't Sharkman think of International/State Jersey Day sooner!??
The two made their way to the rendevouz point to pick up Reb and his wingman, Fire on the way over and then Fire picked up the pace. Sharkman hung on to her wheel, enjoying the tow, while he could hear Reb complaining behind them. Well, at least until he was to far behind to hear......
As the sun began to break through the fog, the scenery broke into a cacophony of muted fall colors! (Belo News will give Shark Minions a few moments to look up "cacophony.")
As Fire and Sharkman approached the Eaton Plant, Rule 24 Guy was there waiting. He asked where Reb and Yeti Boy were (yes, they were that far behind!) when Sharkman rode ahead to get the spectacular shot of the two wayward Shark Minions catching back on in front of a fantastic sunrise.
This is a great country!!!
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| Winner on the day, Cricket!!! |
At the start, riders started piling in and it turned out to be one of the biggest days of the year!!!
The "Sweetheart of the Peloton" along with her main squeeze Toesetter rode in to shouts of "Gazelle Girl!!"
The count on the morning was 18 riders that included just a few with International Jerseys like Swede (of course), Yeti Boy in his South African kit, Stryker Guy in a "Camino de Santiago" jersey and new Shark Minion Fixit sporting a very cool UK jersey!
Sharkman was immediately bestowed the honor of "Best International Day Kit" for his matching Irish socks! Is this a great coutnry or what?!?!
Oh, the excitement!!!
After marching around the start line, strutting his Irish Kit, and making sure everyone saw his socks, Sharkman took the start photo, avoiding the dreaded "selfie" shot and got the party started as the click of pedals and the whir of starting wheels rang out across the great Galesburg area!
Skittles immediately went to the front and pulled our intrepid hero, the Sharkman, to his honorary sprint, looking daper in his Irish colors!! Oh, the dimutive Shark was in his glory on the morning!!!
The Sharkman continued to ride, asking Shark Minions, "did you see my socks match? Uh? did you?" on infinitum.......
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| The guy who started "International Kit Day," the Swede! |
The ride continued on through the col de Twin Lakes and past the Gull Lake High School when the shout of "Mechanical" was heard after most of the Shark Minions had already crossed Rt. 89.
It turned out that Hoosier Boy had a flat in the run up to Rt. 89 and Hermster stayed with him. Reb and Skittles went back and after a prolonged period, it was learned they went through a few tubes before they found one that held air. Thankfully, Certified Bike Mechanic Skittles was on it but we did learn that Hermster carries like 5 million tubes with him!!! Oh, the humanity!
The tubs coming out of his wedge was likened by witness to look like clowns coming out of a minature fire engine.....
Hoosier Boy will need to stock up on tubes!
With a blast of CO2, a whiff of the gas and a mighty "Hi Ho, Silver," the the riders were off again and into the usual fast section of the Kountry Klub!
Past the Yorkville Church, Kellogg Korner, the Kountry Klub and on to the turn to the final sprint, the pace continued to climb as the sun warmed the riders backs and the sprint called them to the front.
Up over the col de Norte and through the Holy Rollers there was no let up as Athletic Mentors and Skittles, along with Rocketman and an occassional burst from Hermster, kept the pace up.
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| Rule 24 Guy in Irish Orange! |
Fixit put in an attack on the run up to the Inlet Sprint that seemed to bring the Shark Minion Nation even more alive!
After a FULL stop at the Inlet, the riders took a breath or two before the crossing of the Digital Divide and before Stryker Guy dropped off to head home for family duties.
The pace line started up immediately when Rocketman and Skittles went to the front, joined by Crickett later. The pace got up to a steady 24 mph as the fast moving train moved towards the sprint.
Again, the Shark Minion Nation began to wonder where Gazelle Girl was, but as the mass of riders got closer to the sprint, Gazelle Girl made her move with a lead out from Cricket that took them both, flying past the peloton to take the GGG Spot finish!
It was a victory for America!!!
After the GGG Spot Sprint finish and the crossing, Sharkman began to worry that with all the sprinters in this days group, he needed a rabbit to try to break up the peloton. Initially, it seemed no one joined him as he headed south, but then Rocketman threw himself on his sword and went forward, taking the
speed up to around 24-25 mph!
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| Fire was, well....on Fire! |
Sharkman held on to his wheel, and being second in line, was hoping he could last, at least, until the final climb.
Alas, after a humongus pull, Rocketman pulled off and Sharkman was forced to take over well before the climb.
To his credit (and his amazement) he was able to hold the speed at 24 mph and got them to the base of the hill, and part way up, where he was spent and a cast of thousands, led by Skittles and Cricket, buzzed by him.
He did get a second wind as he began his descent to the final sprint, but it was not enough to get him close.
Meanwhile, at the front, Cricket took the finish with Skittles and Maid Marion just behind him!
It was a fast, clean finish and the pace on the day was 19.07 MPH!
It was a victory for America!!!
The crowds on the Champs le Galesburg went wild as the riders zipped up their jerseys for the sponsors and motored their way to the Koffee Klutch for the Press Conference.
Bissell Boy bought the Koffee and it seemed like he has done that on a regular basis this season! Thanks Bissell Boy, we're giving you the rest of the season off on buying koffee! You ROCK!!!
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| Bissell Boy who bought on the day!!! |
The Klutch was rocking with the crowd and the Shark Minion Nation had to put two tables together to fit the rowdy riders in. The koffee flowed and the discussion carried on. It is always difficult to see another season winding down and the weather has been incredible!
While the riders drank, rain feel, but stopped before the ride home. Unfortunately, the roads were wet enough to make the ride home soggy and cold......
But the weather is projected to stay warmish!
So, Sharkman has decided to keep the Shark Minion Nation on the roads for another week, rather than moving to the Fort.
Due to the darkness, and possible "coolness" on Saturday morning the ride is being moved back a half an hour to a 9 a.m. launch.
Sooo......
This Saturday!
October 16, 2021
"Make a Wish Jersey Day!" The Nation hasn't had WAM Jersey Day this year, so pull out that kit to ride! WAM, Make a Wish, Team Taylor or Team Eaton are all in the mix!!!
NEW LAUNCH TIME - NEW LAUNCH TIME - NEW LAUNCH TIME!
Launch Time - 9:00 a.m. - SHARP!
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| The Klutch was rocking!!! |
Be there!!!
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| The man of many tubes! Hermster |
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| Toesetter, beard unbraided! |
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| The two "legends," Bissell Boy and Stryker Guy! |
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| Raptor in his checkerboard! |
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| Yeti Boy, in his South Africa kit! |
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| "Gazelle Girl!" |
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| Reb in long sleeve jersey, covered by his T shirt..... |
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| Hoosier Boy! |
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| Skittles was back and took 2d on the day! |
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| Wishbone was ready! |
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| What a celebration of Fall!!! |
WANTED: ALIVE - ZYCHKMANN, AKA FABIO!
Belo News
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| Fabio, aka Zyckhmann! |
October 13, 2021
Shark Cove, Mi. - Has anyone seen Zyckmann, aka Fabio?
An "APSMB" (All Poins Shark Minion Bulletin) has been issued for his return!
The notoriously reclusive rider has hardly been in the Nation this season.
Where has he gone to?
Last seen a few weeks ago, joining on the Shark Minion Train half way through the ride, at the col de Norte, then having a kup of Koffee at the Klutch and then.....nada!?
He seems to have simply, disappeared.......
Where are you Fabio! A lonely Shark Minion Nation awaits your return?
Is it something we said?
All attempts by Belo News to reach the often misunderstood, many named (and mis-spelled) biking phenom, have meet with email rejections sighting the email as being sent to his SPAM file.
Oh, the humanity!
The Mighty Shark Minion Nation wonders, "when will he return?"
Please come back!!!
We need to get you back to the home!!!
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| The many faces of Fabio! |
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| Please help us find him! We need to get him back on his meds! |
YETI BOY INVITATION!?!
BREAD PARTY THIS SUNDAY AFTERNOON!!!
Belo News
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| Yeti Boy, rocking the Yankee Springs Time Trial also rocks his wood fired oven this Sunday! |
October 17, 2021
Bread City, Mi. - Some Shark Minions may not know about Yeti Boy's alter ego. He is a Bread Baker and Pizza maker extraodinaire!
This Sunday, October 17, 2021, from 3 p.m. until 6 p.m. he is sponsoring a Fundraiser for the Food Bank of Southern Michigan.
This year he is inviting the mighty Shark Minion Nation and guest to sample his wares. He is promising his home made crackers, breads, cheese, and spreads along with pizza, all produced and baked in his famous wood fired oven!
Is this a great country or what?!?
Wildman has promised to bring his guitar and there will be outdoor sports (corn hole) as well.
Plug in 63 West Minges Road, Battle Creek, Mi. 49015 into your GPS and....
BE THERE!
RSVP to schweitzerdl@gmail.com
You won't regret it....just ask Gazelle Girl!!!
P.S......bring lawn chairs and cash or check!!!
Riders joining the Minion rides acknowledge the inherent risk involved with bicycle riding and by joining any Minion ride hold harmless any rider involved.
