An Important Message from the Sharkman

We lost one of our own this past week, someone who rode with many of you this past summer as a celebrity rider and former Minion.

It is with deep regret that I report that Jeff Webster, aka Bianchi Boy and an original Minion who you will remember rode with us on a single speed earlier this summer, lost his son Aaron in a car accident last Saturday morning. Aaron was 20 years old.

Some of you may also remember that Aaron rode my cyclocross bike as a celebrity rider with his Dad back in July. If you were there that morning you would remember him for his big smile and easy going way. He was an exceptional rider and former Colorado State Junior Mountain Biking Champion and his loss leaves a big whole in the hearts of the Minion Nation. He was also a very exceptional young man.

I will remember Aaron as someone whose shining eyes brought a smile to everyone he met and for his big heart and gentle manner.

Jeff wrote a heart felt letter to those of us who knew Aaron and I share some of that here.

Aaron attended Baylor last year, but transferred to the University of Arkansas to be closer to home and close to his fiancée.

Aaron was one of those rare young men who was all about helping others, especially kids. He was always smiling, laughing, and bringing the best out of people. He worked the last two summers at the Roger's Activity Center. A local "YMCA" type facility, often for families that are less privileged to attend higher end places. He worked with the 6th graders, and he was well loved for his work there.

Aaron continues to help others as he donated his liver and kidneys to save two children in Little Rock, his lungs will save a person in Wisconsin, and Illinois. His heart which was as big as Texas, will save a 32 yr old Texan. He'll give the gift of sight to two others. And much more.....

The Aaron Webster Memorial Fund for helping underprivileged children has been set up. Any gifts you care to send are tax deductible. Please mail any donations to the address below. For questions contact Coleta Paris @ 479.631.0336 x434:

Aaron Webster Memorial Fund
The Rogers Activity Center
315 West Olive Street
Rogers, Arkansas 72758

Hopefully, some of the Minions will find it in their hearts to make a donation to remember one of our own.

To his parents, Jeff and Teena, his sisters, Rachael and Katie, we offer our thoughts and heart felt prayers and please know that “we leave no Minion behind.”

Aaron will ride with the Minions whenever and wherever we ride.

Before we ride this Saturday, we will honor Aaron’s memory with a moment of silence. When we saddle up and click in, the Sharkman and his Mighty Minion Nation will carry Aaron’s memory in our hearts.

Labor Day Weekend was a Beer Fest

Oberon Controls the Peloton

"Miller Time" Rules Sprints

Falcon Takes Podium


Galesburg, MI
September 5, 2009

Galesgurg, MI - 23 Minions showed up for Beer Jersey Day, must of thought they'd be filling water bottles with the stuff or something. Per usual, Oberon ruled the day with 6 riders kitted up and All Black was awarded best jersey, sporting his Ryde Beer kit with the slogan "draught me " and several Minions took advantage of his offer.

Danimal and Hausman led the riders up 36th street and went off the front at a considerable distance until Falcon bridged the gap yielding the first sprint to the missing Sharkman.

Iron Man took the Col de Twin Lakes climb as we were joined by Knute and then it was Miller Time. The majority of the intermediate sprints were taken by the father/son duo, Mike and Luke Miller. If this publication is granted a vote they would now be known as Oil Man and Skywalker in the Mighty Minion Nation.

Stryker Guy was thrown deep into the "Pain Cave" through the Country Club Hills and the run up to M-43. Apparently he started Beer Day the night prior and was a bit wounded after a two week hiatus from his steed.

The group lifted the pace down 37th hitting 27 mph and setting a new average high of 21.5 mph for the ride. Did we already say it was "Miller Time"?!

As the peloton crested the final rise toward the sprint the group began to split and the lead outs fell off the pace. At the finish line it was Falcon and for the first time this year a tie for second between Wildman and Iron Man.

As Fall is upon us the rides will continue as long as possible. We will lose a few to soccer and other events but we will ride as long as the weather permits.

College Game Day Big Success!

MSU Wins!

Ironman, Un-Named Rider, Kid Doster on the Podium!

Who Bought the Koffee?

Belo News Update
Galesburg, MI.
August 29, 2009

Galesburg, Mi. – The Mighty Minion Nation had one of the best turn outs of the season on Saturday, when 24 Minions, many decked out in College Kit, showed up for the KK-TdG start.

UCLA, Wisconsin, Cincinnati, Illinois, three Michigan States and Two Michigan Jerseys were represented in the peloton. Falcon, showing up late once again, failed to make the photo op (see photo). After autographs, the Minions began to get anxious for the start.

Two new riders joined the group and they came equipped with their own nick names! Guess word has gotten out that getting named by the Minions might not be a good thing!

Welcome to new riders Dutch and Chumly! Chumly was actually equipped with a neck brace! Had he heard about this group and just come prepared?

No, he had actually suffered a broken neck in a mountain bike accident and was in recovery. What?!? That’s right! One tough Minion! He will fit right in with this group! He certainly get’s “Stud of the Week” honors!

The Skipper, decked out in his University of Oberon jersey, got the bunch of coeds started off as the sound of pedals “clicking in” could be heard through out the crisp autumn like air.

As the large group worked its way past the Klutch, Luann gave a wave to our intrepid hero’s from the window as they talked and socialized like a bunch of kids on the first day of school.

Once again, Gazelle Girl met the peloton on the way north of the city. Sharkman commented that he realized that she had figured a way to get her name in the Update each week by arriving at the start in this fashion and she stated that it also gave her more time to sleep!

Danimal and Falcon lead out our hero, the Sharkman, as he took the ceremonial first sprint.

The group stayed bunched as everyone enjoyed watching, what has now become known as, the Rose Bowl of Cycling. Falcon, decked out in his Michigan Jersey, and Zickman, attired in his UCLA Kit, fought it out in a neck and neck battles around the course, with intermittent interruptions by Bissell Boy, Brewman and Dr. Dave in their MSU kit, and others, joining in the fun. Even Wolf King in his Illinois kit took a jump on the Col de Norte and nearly took the climb before being caught by the Pirate, looking quite dapper in his Cincinnati kit as he too, made a run at the Big Ten!

Some of the riders split off after the inlet and the remainder of the Minions moved on to the Rt. 89 crossing where the usual double pace line picked up the speed. Again, the college kit ruled, as the Un-Named Rider, in his Michigan jersey took the G Ave. sprint.

New rider, Dutch, and the Sharkman, led the Minions after the G Ave. crossing. However, no one seemed to want to play as they looked back and no one would come through. The Minions just left them both out front to do all the work. All Black later joined in along with a few other riders as the peloton approached the hill to the finish.

As the Mighty Minion Nation crested the final climb, the riders began to make their move.

Sharkman later commented that he was concerned about the bunch finish, but everyone held their lines and it was a clean shot to the stop ahead.

As the sun began to break out of the clouds and over the blessed Minions, they bore down on the finish like a colorful viper snake ready to strike on the stop ahead sign!

Not wanting to give the college guys a win, Ironman took the lead, with the Un-Named Rider and none other than Kid Doster on his wheel.

The Update can’t remember, but we think this is the Un-Named Riders first podium appearance, but not Kid Dosters, who’s name might change to “Podium Boy” for his third place finish.

The fans went wild on the Champs le Galesburg as our hero’s zipped up their jerseys for the sponsors and colleges and then waved to the paparazzi as the photo’s were taken.

What happened next, however, will need careful clarification.

Sharkman, not wanting to be behind anyone in line ordering a foo foo Koffee in the Klutch, ran the light (shame on him) attempting to be first in line. He could not, however, beat another Minion in getting to Luann first. However, Bissell Boy jumped in with a $20 bill and told Luann, “I’m buying until the $20 runs out!” Whoa, big time thanks to Bissell Boy (and he mentioned that Zickman had done it the previous week – Whoa, big time thanks to Zickman and don’t ever do that again unless Sharkman is in attendance!).

However, for some reason, the Minions began thanking the Sharkman for buying the Koffee because he was at the front of the line! Heck, we don’t think Sharkman has bought koffee all year! He has milked this “Sharkman” thing the whole season!

So, to set the record strait, Bissell Boy bought the first $20 worth of koffee!

Sharkman will again be absent next week, as he is heading out to Crested Butte, Colorado to mountain bike with his Shark Son-in-Laws and play with his Grandsharklets! So someone will have to report in to the Update on next weeks activities…..and what are those activities?

Next week is Labor Day Weekend and what do people do on Labor Day Weekend you ask? They drink beer! Yes, Beer! Is this a great country or what? Lager, Bitter, Lite, Wheat, you name it, we love beer after a hard days work!

So, in honor of Labor Day, Saturday’s ride has been declared, “Beer Jersey Day.”

Minions are asked to wear their favorite Beer Jersey for the ride.

Will Oberon get knocked from the top of the favorite beer podium spot? Be there Saturday to find out!

Saturday – Launch Time 8:00 A.M. – SHARP!

There are just so many weekends left!

They're everywhere!

Is this gal ready for Game Day or what? How we pay homage...in so many ways.

Minions Ride Without Incident!

Wildman Returns

Doctors Duel

Knute Surly on Fixie

Belo News
August 22, 2009
Gull Lake

It seems that all was back to normal in the peloton as 16 Shark-less minions rode on a cloudy, brisk morning. Not only were they Shark-less, they were without Skipper, so Danimal lead the peloton out of the parking lot with his buddies Chumley and Dan Henshaw, both returning from injuries. It was a bit frightening for the minions to witness Chumley in a full back and neck brace due to injuries sustained on his mountain bike but All Black, back in All Black, had a calming affect as they headed north on 36th at a social pace. The pace lifted and Sharkman was granted the honorary opening sprint and the speed increased nearing the 35th Street sprint as Hausman won uncontested.

As they spun through Twin Lakes and up the Col the group splintered and a small group went off the front with No Name taking the sprint at DE. The pace continued to lift as the pack went through Country Club Hills and several riders were shoved into the "pain cave" with the move up to M-43 where the Zickman took the sprint.

The tight grupetto including Stryker Guy, Sooner, who reported the only riding he has done this year is on Saturdays, B-Rod, Sting Ray and Bissell Boy headed south after the climb up Col de Norte. Wildman showed he has been working hard to dominate tri's this summer winning the Frona's sprint.

The peloton acquired Knute on the run down 39th as he was peddling a fine Surly Fixie and the the Doctors Scalpel Duel began as Dr. Dave and Zickman dueled it out for the Bay sprint with Dr. Dave edging out the Z-man.

Gazelle Girl in fine late season form was riding with the front group all day and continued as they headed down 37th in what would turn out to be nearly a 20 mph average. The G Ave sprint went uncontested. No Name showing Super Domestique work pulled the group up the last rise toward the sprint and the group chased toward the finish. Iron Man took final honors, sharing the podium with Zickman and Falcon.

Will Sharkman return? When is College Game Day? Show up Saturday for the last ride of August!

Cloud Girl vs. Bambi!

Bambi Banned!

Belo News

Galesburg, Mi.

August 15, 2009

Galesburg, Mi. – The buzz in bike circles this entire week has been, “How is Cloud Girl?”

The emails started pouring in on Saturday afternoon and on into Monday morning. “How was Cloud Girl doing?” They all asked.

The Update is very pleased to report that Cloud Girl is doing fine despite the major road rash and crunched, but not broken, pinkie finger that she suffered after her run in with Bambi on Saturday.

Unless you live in a cave, you are by now aware that our own Cloud Girl tangled with a wayward deer during last Saturday’s KK-TdG. The Update has been amazed that people who don’t even ride a bike, were aware of the incident and wanted to know how Cloud Girl was doing.

The day began innocently enough when 22 minions toed the start line. Prior to the Skipper starting the group out, our intrepid hero, the Sharkman, cautioned everyone that there was some sort of event around Gull lake involving runners and bikers and that everyone needed to be careful.

The start of the ride was peaceful enough with a couple more riders joined on, including Gazelle Girl, as the peloton moved north of town.As the Minions made the turn at the Yorkville Church, some of the runners and bikers began to appear on the course and the entire peloton, not wanting to repeat the Shermanator debacle, slowed and cautioned that they were “passing on the left.”

As the Peloton grouped up at the summit of the cul de Norte, Cloud Girl shouted out to Sharkman that she was on and the Minions started down the hill with Cloud Girl in tow.

But as the group picked up speed and spread out, and as Cloud Girl approached the road to the boat launch at a pretty good clip, a deer ran out in front of her and Cloud Girl “T Boned” the deer, going down hard on the pavement!

Meanwhile, the rest of the peleton was moving ahead and did not hear a shout that a rider was down.Airman and Dr. Dave realized the crash and were able to respond. There was also a very kind couple who stopped and were able to not only help, but gave Cloud Girl a ride back to her car.

The deer, however, could not be reached for comment. A spokesman for the deer named Thumper did state that the deer's mother has severely reprimanded her for not looking both ways before crossing and has been told that she is not to play in the street if the Minions are riding!

Cloud Girl sustained some pretty severe road rash to her shins, arms and lower back as she skidded across the road. She did, however, do a great job in protecting her Kuota, which came out of the debacle without a scratch. Her brand new helmet, however, was not as lucky as it took a good crack.

As the hapless Minions contested the C Ave. sprint, they had circled up at Fronas to wait for riders when a lady in a minivan told them, “the girl rider hit a deer at the last road!”

The Minions, realizing it had to be Cloud Girl, immediately started back and confusion ruled as they could not find the scene of the accident. This also caused the Minions to have to repeat the Bible Conference Hills that everyone seems to hate! Damn Bible Conference Hills!

As the Minions scattered along the road, a group that had gotten back to her returned to announce the Cloud Girl was on her way back to the start.

As the Minions staggered in to the Klutch, Luann handed Sharkman the phone. It was Cloud Girl reporting in that she was O.K., but a little shook up. She later came into the Klutch with Airman to display her wounds.

It was also reported, and this is important, that Brewman bought Sharkman his koffee as he spoke on the phone with Cloud Girl.

As previously reported, Bullet Bob and the lovely Mrs. Bullet were on hand (see previous story).
Again, it was an unusual ride......but great weather!

We, here at the Update, are just pleased that Cloud Girl is doing O.K. and hope she will be back in the peloton soon.

Minions are invited to leave get well wishes in the comment section.

You won't want to miss this weeks ride! Mostly out of morbid curiosity..... but you won't want to miss it!

It is, however, reported that our hero, the Sharkman, will not be in attendance, but the Minions will ride!

Launch Time - 8:00 A.M. - Sharp!

Minions Rule at Shermanator!

Abebe Bikila a Shark Minion?

Belo News Update
Sherman Lake, MI.
August 1, 2009

Sherman Lake, Mi. – While the Shermanator was doing a number on the Shark Minion Peloton, some Minions were doing a number on the Shermantator. Our own Nikeboy, Hoosier Boy and Hutch were all entered and did an outstanding job! And they didn't crash into anyone!

Nikeboy is rumored to have won his age group, as did Hoosier Boy. Meanwhile, our own Hutch ran the running leg, (are you ready for this?) in his bare feet! What? You ask…..

In an exclusive Shark Minion Update investigative report, it has been learned that Hutch actually finished the bike segment and went to the wrong bike slot. After spending a couple of minutes looking for his shoes that were not there (because they were at his assigned slot) he decided that he either could quit or run.

What, a Minion quit? No way! Minions never quit!

So our hero, the Hutch Man, ran bare foot like the famous Abebe Bikila! For those of you too young to know or remember, Abebe Bikila won the 1960 Olympic Gold Medal in the Marathon running the streets of Los Angeles for 26.2 miles in his bare feet!

Proof, you ask? Check out the photos at;

www.backprint.com/estf.asp?PID=bp%19sEw&EVENTID=53155&PWD=&BIB=133

You may find a barefoot competitor in the running photos!

Hutch wins the “Stud of the week” award. The Minions might want to start calling him Abebe Hutch!

Congratulations to all the Minions who competed at the Shermanator!


Injury Update!

Belo News
Galesburg, Mi.
August 15, 2009

Galesburg, Mi. – The Update was a bit premature with the injury report last week!

Bullet Bob and his lovely wife Sharon, joined the Minions for a Kup of Koffee at the Klutch on Saturday to report on Bullets crash injuries.

It appears that our fellow Minion, Bullet Bob, has three broken ribs in his back and it might be a few weeks before he is back in the peleton. He is, however, able to drink Koffee at the Klutch and it was good to have he and Sharon back in the peloton, even though it was only in the Koffee Shop.

We are holding a spot in the peloton for you Bullet! Get well soon!