WAS THAT ZYCKMANN!???

So, do you see Zyckmann? We don't see Zyckmann......

EASTY HAS CAREER DAY!

WHAT? NO ENTOURAGE?

SHARKMAN BUYS? WAIT, WHAT?

WHAT EVER HAPPENED TO MAD DOG?!?

DON'T FORGET SHARK MINION NIGHT AT GAZELLE SPORTS!

Belo News
August 26, 2017

Shark Cove, Mi. - As dawn broke, AGAIN, cold and bright over the Shark Cove, our intrepid hero, the Sharkman, was happy to be going back to his beloved Nation but was wishing it was a bit warmer on an August morning. Normally, Sharkman loves cooler weather, but 46 degrees at launch time made it seem more like late October!

Style Guy Easty had
a career day and looked great!
Love those knee warmers!

Padding his way down to the Shark Basement/Bike Workshop/Locker Room, our intrepid hero started to dig out his arm warmers, leg warmers, shoe covers, gloves, jacket. Clothes were flying everywhere as our hero looked for warmth!

As he glanced at the Shark Thermometer as he headed out to the garage, it showed 46.8 degrees with the arrow indicating the temp was still dropping. Oh, the humanity!

Sharkman knew that Yeti Boy was out of town and he had not heard from Nikeboy or Reb, but still held out hope that Mad Dog would finally return to the Nation.......but no Mad Dog......

For the first time in a long time, the Sharkman was riding solo to the start! Though he had done this for years in the early days, since Mad Dog had entered the fold, it had been some time!

As Sharkman passed Helmer, no Reb. As he passed the Human Society, no Skittles, as he passed Stone Jug, no X-Rod......

But as he turned on to Renton Road and head towards the railroad tracks, he saw a blinking light in the distance. Who could it be?

Virgin Minion Chad.

As he got to Michigan, he caught up with Echo!

Echo told the old Shark that Skittles was with his daughter at a Triathlon and so the two rode to the start together, crossing over the Kalamazoo River on the new bridge that hadn't officially opened, but looked to be done.

At the start, riders were already starting to form up for the start.

Two Virgin Minions were in attendance. Chad and Brian had found out about the ride from Bulldog and did not bring their own Minion Names, but stand by, Virgin Minions! Welcome to the mighty Minion Nation Chad and Brian!

As Sharkman was taking photos, Gazelle Girl rode in to only one shout of "Gazelle Girl" because, well, she came in when Sharkman wasn't looking!

Easty was prepping and looooking goooood! The man, apparently trying to keep up with Nikeboy, was decked out in his Rapha Kit with day glow colors, and with white lace shoes! This was topped of with his new, iridescent neon yellow knee warmers that he wouldn't quit talking about! Get ready Bike Merchant's! There will be a run on knee warmers!

Virgin Minion Chad.

Not to be out done, Squeaky rode in with most of his winter gear on his upper body, but in shorts. This seemed to be a first for the diminutive rider, though he did have on two different gloves, which is standard for the anti-style guy!

As the old Shark chided Tan Man, who was taking forever to get his bike ready, to get over for the start photo Tan Man simply signaled to "go ahead!"

At 8:00 a.m. - SHARP! The mighty Minion Nation, 18 strong, pulled out of the station to the sound of shoes clicking into pedals and a hush from adoring fans!

As the Nation passed the Klutch, the early morning group waved and Mary, who worked with Sharkman at Kellogg, was in the street to say hello to the cyclists as they rode by.

As the Nation headed north and Sharkman pointed out the right turn for the A Group, there were no takers, which meant the pace for the B Group might be a bit more "frisky."

Tan Man was at the front, leading out our hero and as Sharkman passed him to take the sprint he was heard to murmur, "you're making me work way too hard!"

The Nation cruised through the col de Twin Lakes, and as they headed towards the Yorkville Church, PJ reported he had broken a shifter cable and was pulling out at the turn.

Sharkman photo bombing his photo!

Other riders were joining on as the ride continued through Kellogg Korner, the Kountry Klub and on to route 43. The group was spread out, but came together at the turn after the Kountry Klub as riders sat up for that brief moment after the turn.

The riders were grouped up at the front as Easty began to tell a joke. At the punch line, he made a sudden move as the Nation laughed and he took his first sprint! Whoa! Must be the Rapha kit, the shoes or the knee warmers! Or the joke....... Oh, the humanity!

As they stopped after the Rt. 43 Sprint, Sharkman noticed Zyckmann in the mix. Where did he come from? He claimed he had been on the ride the whole time, but could not be found in the start photo. After this, Sharkman seemed to notice Zyckmann everywhere! Maybe it was his wild jersey, maybe his personality, maybe something else, but the man, the myth, the legend seemed to be all over the place!

At the top of the col de Norte, Sharkman had pulled over to the opposite side of the road to take his count and as Bulldog crested the hill he seemed to be looking back and saying, "I have to pee, I have to pee!" or words to that effect. As he was looking right and shouting, he turned to look ahead and realized he was crashing into the rear wheel of Virgin Minion Brian!

As their wheels collided, Bulldog pulled off one of the most memorable somersaults in cycling history! Realizing he was going to make contact, he went over the bars, did a somersault and stuck the landing by standing up immediately after the headlong roll, as if to say, "I meant to do that!" It was hard not to applaud the move and Sharkman gave him a sold score of 10 on form! Thankfully no one was hurt, but it did take a few minutes to take the two bikes apart.

The only thing bigger than the piece
of pie B-Rod ate, was.....

On with the ride!

Sharkman announced to the Nation to move ahead, then had to scramble to catch back on.

Sharkman grabbed the wheel of Stroker and rode him like a red headed step son on through the Holy Rollers and into the feed stop. Thanks Stroker!

As the ride went on, some of the leaders, with Tan Man in the lead, missed the turn as Sharkman and Easty caught it and moved ahead, giggling as they did......

After the Digital Divide a very nice pace line formed up as the speed moved up as well.

Gazelle Girl once again took the GGG Spot Sprint, though there was a bit of a "ghost" of last weeks debacle, but it was a victory for America and all was well in the Kingdom once again as the "Sweetheart of the Peloton" was back and justice was serviced.

As the Nation made the turns to get to the final stretch, Sharkman and Stryker Guy found themselves at the front doing an easy 19 mph. The two questioned each other as to why they were in front and pondered why no one was coming around them.

Was B-Rods mouth!
Oh, the humanity!

Reflecting on it, Stryker Guy stated he thought it meant they were all lining up to get in position for the final sprint and that always scares our intrepid hero, the Sharkman.

At the foot of the final ascent, riders began to make their moves as they streaked past the two riders. Stryker Guy took a wheel and went, while Sharkman worked on getting a second wind.

As the mass of riders descended to the finish like a run away train, they jockeyed for positions and seemed to hold their lines well! Sharkman worked his way back up, but no where near the leaders.

Tan Man moved on to take the win, with B-Rod on his wheel, and Easty taking the third spot on the podium!

Easty's first podium finish! This prompted Sharkman to ride ahead to buy koffee! It was another victory for America!

You go Easty!

There was a festive mood at the Klutch as the riders reflected on the mornings jaunt through the kountry side and a certain reverence for another season starting to wind down.

Is that Zyckmann?

But there is still plenty of time to get out and ride.

Sharkman is doubtful for this Saturday but the ride goes on! Sharkman might be able to sneak it in, but we'll see.......

Saturday, September 2, 2017

Shark Minion Jersey Day!

Launch Time - 8:00 a.m. - SHARP!

Be there!

SHARK MINION NIGHT AT GAZELLE SPORTS!

IS THIS A GREAT COUNTRY OR WHAT?!?

Belo News

August 16, 2017

Kalamazoo, Mi. - Do you like Gazelle Sports? Do you like getting a deal? Well this is for you, Bunkie!

Gazelle Sports is planning a Shark Minion Night on Thursday, September 28 from 5-8 at Gazelle Sports on Burdick in Kalamazoo. There will be food and drink (beer, hard cider, wine, pop and some appetizers). Minions will receive a discount on anything they purchase that evening.  Our own Nikeboy has been working with Gazelle Sports on the event and he will be inviting others.  

Previously, RSVP's were supposed to go only to Nikeboy who had to set a date of 9/1 due to his travel. 

However, Gazelle Girl has volunteered to take reservations up until 9/25! Is this a great country or what?!?

But don't wait! Sharkman and Lava Girl will be there to sign autographs! Consider this Sharkmans RSVP, Gazelle Girl!

Get your reservations in to Gazelle Girl ASAP at joan.o@comcast.net 

So get those RSVP's in to Gazelle Girl ASAP, Bunkie!

Riders joining the Minion rides acknowledge the inherent risk involved with bicycle riding and by joining any Minion ride hold harmless any rider involved.

KIWI WINS HAT-TRICK OF SPRINTS SPARKING DOPING ACCUSATION!

NO ‘A’ GROUP THIS WEEK = B+ FOR EVERYONE! 

SKITTLES TAKES THE COL de TWIN LAKES!

FALCON DEMOTED TO 'PERSONA NON GRATA' AFTER LEAVING GAZELLE GIRL UNSATISFIED!

IS A MINION RIDE WITHOUT SHARKMAN JUST LIKE JAWS WITHOUT THE SHARK?

NEW RSVP DATE FOR SHARK MINION NIGHT AT GAZELLE SPORTS!

BeloNews

Wednesday, August 23, 2017

Tom Wolfe Reporting

Skittles Lair, Mi. - Dawn broke over the Creek to be Battled for Saturday morning to find Echo waiting patiently at Skittles’ humble abode - a rainbow colored bouncy house castle - on this curiously chilly morning for their usual “slow n sweet” ride out to the start. They eventually caught up to X-Rod who took note that Skittles rides aluminum wheels and Echo has her sweet new Bontrager carbon/aluminum hybrid wheels. X-Rod stated he’d therefore prefer not to ride near such austerity and so he'd be waiting for Nikeboy and his fancy-pants ENVE wheels. Skittles took the opportunity to remind Echo that her wheels are as fast as full carbon ones but “we could be riding unicycles in trench coats, we are both faster than those two clowns.” 

The twosome arrived at the start to spot just a handful of riders. Would Sharkman’s absence spur the peloton to find other things to do on a beautiful Saturday morning? 

Gazelle Girl arrived to the usual chant of “GAZELLE GIRL!”  More riders joined just barely before wheels-up time, including Dreamboat and Half-Moon. No one got an exact head count or a group photo but the count seemed to be north of 30 riders once they collected Kid Doster, Falcon and Ironman. 

The grupetto moved ahead in their usual somewhat subdued fashion led mostly by your humble author and B-Rod until Skittles yelled out “A Riders to the right, A Riders to the right.” Only Ironman and Kiwi went this way and so the threesome decided to move back in to the main group, forming a “B+ Group” this week.

Having reached the beginning of the Col de Twin Lakes, the gruppetto moved rather slowly down through the Col de Twin Lakes when a twosome of Ironman and Dreamboat broke away towards the finish line. Skittles hit the gas to catch up and deftly waited until just the right instant to nab the sprint point. 

The gruppetto rode down M-43 single file without incident other than noting ten or so Rat Rods, no doubt on their way to the Gilmore Car Museum. The turn off the highway found the gruppetto moving sort of slowly up to the Williams to Sheffield intersection when Skittles noticed the always dangerous Dreamboat make a move and so he countered, carefully swerving his way around B-Rod and up to and past Falcon and Ironman. He then got into the drops and just pedaled his ever-loving face off going up the hill to take this oft-contested sprint point with Dreamboat just half a wheel behind. Reached for comment later, Skittles exclaimed “Man, I loves me some uphill sprinting.” Is this a great country or what? No wonder North Korea won’t leave us alone.  

As the riders bore down on the GGG Spot Sprint, Skittles was sitting third wheel behind Dreamboat and somebody else, he looked over his shoulder to see if the First Lady of the Peloton would be taking her traditional sprint glory.  He noticed Gazelle Girl violently and breathlessly gesticulating at high speed with all the sound and fury one would imagine a supermarket paperback novel to inspire when Falcon came around to steal Gazelle Girl’s rightful place. He flopped all three inches out as far as he could stand and had just enough to get the tip onto the GGG Spot. Quoth Gazelle Girl post-sprint: “I can’t believe I shaved my legs for this. Actually, I’m stunned he lasted that long. Come to think of it, I’m not even mad, I'm impressed!” Afterward, Falcon gave the following counterpoint: “I just couldn't help myself.” Poor Falcon.  But hey, we’ve all been there. Well, in actual fact, Skittles hasn't. He's a real man.  

(Editors Note: The Commissioner of Cycling, as well as the cycling world, has declared Falcon "Persona Non Grata" for two editions of Belo News for this grievous violation of protocol!)

The final sprint was all that was left - with Dreamboat, Ironman and others pulling along at a fantastic pace, roughly 30 mph. A rider opened up a gap and Skittles moved to close it, moving too soon as it turned out. Dreamboat was on his wheel when Kiwi came around them both to take his third Final Sprint win in a row! Oh the Huge Manatee! 

Kiwi is hereby informed to report to USADA for a drugs test.  

The riders made their way up the Avenue de Chämps-Gälésbürg to find such a deafening roar that it was impossible to see through the sound waves just how many of the tifosi had made their way down to cheer on our heroes. 

Klutch time got its start with Sasquatch (Sas is expecting his first child in six weeks!) buying Koffee for the group with chatter about the usual errata. Eventually it was revealed that Half-Moon had done her last ever Minion Ride on her current bike as she had ordered a gorgeous new custom Trek Emonda Project One from the Trek Store for Skittles to build the very minute it comes in so she can participate in a ride that weekend. 

The group reminded Half-Moon that TIPS stands for “TO INSURE PROMPT SERVICE.” But also that beer is probably the number one way to grease the wheels in any organization, but twenty dollar bills help as well.  

SHARK MINION NIGHT AT GAZELLE SPORTS! 

IS THIS A GREAT COUNTRY OR WHAT?!?

Belo News

August 16, 2017

Kalamazoo, Mi. - Do you like Gazelle Sports? Do you like getting a deal? Well this is for you, Bunkie!

Gazelle Sports is planning a Shark Minion Night on Thursday, September 28 from 5-8 at Gazelle Sports on Burdick in Kalamazoo. There will be food and drink (beer, hard cider, wine, pop and some appetizers). Minions will receive a discount on anything they purchase that evening.  Our own Nikeboy has been working with Gazelle Sports on the event and he will be inviting others.  

Previously, RSVP's were supposed to go only to Nikeboy who had to set a date of 9/1 due to his travel. 

However, Gazelle Girl has volunteered to take reservations up until 9/25! Is this a great country or what?!?

But don't wait! Get your reservations in to Gazelle Girl ASAP at joan.o@comcast.net 

So get those RSVP's in to Gazelle Girl ASAP, Bunkie!

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Riders joining the Minion rides acknowledge the inherent risk involved with bicycle riding and by joining any Minion ride hold harmless any rider involved.

BLOODY 'ELL 'UNDRED ROCKS THE WALLDORF!

MINION RIDE AT THE SAME TIME? WAIT, WHAT???

MINION NIGHT AT GAZELLE SPORTS! 

IS THIS A GREAT COUNTRY OR WHAT?!?

MAPLE HILL TRAIL, LOWER SECTION COMPLETE 

AND IT ROCKS!!!

Belo News

August 12, 2017

Gazelle Girl reporting;

Triple Nasty Rancho, Mi. - As dawn broke over the Triple Nasty Rancho, Toesetter surfaced from a deep slumber to the strains of Gazelle Girl screaming “BLOODY ‘ELL!” After assuring himself that the shout was, indeed, the name of a famous cycling event and not spoken in alarm, Toe sprang from bed and commenced to whip up a batch of his famous Bloody Marys.

A somewhat chilly morn for August greeted the lycra-clad GG and Toe as they loaded up to head to Zychmann’s lakeside pad. The duo was greeted by a whistling Zychmann wiping down his steed with a damp cloth. Gazelle Girl double checked Zychmann’s right thigh to be sure he wasn’t using his famed “Satchmo Wad” to do the wiping. Oh, the humanity. Luckily, Zychmann’s typical lump of white facial clothe was neatly tucked into his shorts.

With the bar set up and the deviled eggs assembled, Minions bedecked in their handsome Bloody ‘ell ‘undred jerseys began to filter in. Yeti, AKA Breadman, sashayed in with a gorgeous plate of still-warm blueberry scones. Is this a great country or what? Also in the mix were B-Rod, Stryker Guy, newish Minion Shonger and not-yet-seen-this-year Minion Chico! A small, but powerful, troop.

Bloodies were tipped and introductions were in order as two of Zychmann’s favorite ladies joined the party - wife Marsha and daughter Caty who was visiting from LA.

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The crew headed out into an unseasonably brisk NW wind to head - where else - northwest! As has been the way of the BEU for the past several years, Chico eventually moved to the front and got the train hummin’. Not too far into the day shouts of “Mechanical!” were heard with the discovery of B-Rod suffering from a softie - tire that is. Toesetter’s hand pump provided a boost that was intended to get B-Rod to the nearest gas station to top off the tire. Alas, Mr. Rod’s tire had other plans and

eventually went completely flat. Upon examination, it was discovered that the poor fella had seen better days and was quite fatigued. A call went up for a dollar bill to boot the tired tire. Shonger came through with a single so no one had to give up their twenty - which saved the day. And off they went.

Soon after this stop the crew was slowed once again by the approach of five familiar riders coming in the opposite direction. Rainman, Dreamboat, Mighty Monk, Echo and Classic Gina were out for an early morning 60-miler. Greetings were exchanged and eventually the BEU group continued its quest for refreshments at the Walldorff.

Chico resumed his spot at the front barreling towards lunch. But what’s this? He wasn’t going to lunch! Chico was double booked on this day so he flipped a tad beyond the half way point to get back home. Alas, the pace was now a bit more humane.

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The seven remaining riders arrived hungry and thirsty and looking forward to a tailwind home after all that headwind. Luck would have it that they had a friendly and fairly efficient waitress, thus making it a stellar day at The Walldorff.

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And yet another Minion had overbooked himself. Stryker Guy had to get home to finish the mango salsa he was making for the 100 Men Who Cook fundraiser for the Boys & Girls Club of Greater Kalamazoo. As he excused himself, Yeti Boy followed suit bringing the entourage down to five. Thank goodness for that tailwind.

This is when the pickle juice arrived. Shonger had shared earlier that the elixir does the trick for eliminating muscle cramps. He ordered a round for the crew. Voila! Who knew?

The satiated and uncramped group headed out into the afternoon sun for the lickity split return home with the traditional stop at the Cedar Creek Church then onto Zychmann’s where they were treated to an ice cold mini keg of Oberon and the lapping waves of Gull Lake. Bloody ‘ell! It was a great day! 

Thanks Gazelle Girl for this riveting account of the Bloody 'ell 'undred! Wow!

This week it is back to the Nations "Field of Dreams" know as the KK-TdG!

Saturday, August 19, 2017

Launch Time - 8:00 a.m. - SHARP!

Sharkman will again, be out of action, but the action goes on!

Ride safe!

SHARK MINION NIGHT AT GAZELLE SPORTS! 

IS THIS A GREAT COUNTRY OR WHAT?!?

Belo News

August 16, 2017

Kalamazoo, Mi. - Do you like Gazelle Sports? Do you like getting a deal? Well this is for you, Bunkie!

Gazelle Sports is planning a Shark Minion Night on Thursday, September 28 from 5-8 at Gazelle Sports on Burdick in Kalamazoo.  There will be food and drink (beer, hard cider, wine, pop and some appetizers).  Minions will receive a discount on anything they purchase that evening.  Our own Nikeboy has been working with Gazelle Sports on the event and he will be inviting others.  

Any Minion that wants to attend needs to rsvp Nikeboy at: adingwall32@gmail.com by 9/1.  

Nikeboy, World Traveler that he is, will be gone much of September touring Italy by bike, so he needs to RSVPs soon! Sharkman and Lava Girl plan on stopping by and a possible beer stop after might break out in downtown Kazoo! Oh, the humanity!

So get those RSVP's in to Nikeboy ASAP, Bunkie!

Maple Hill Trail - Lower Douglas Section Preview SWMMBA president Tony shares what's in store for riders on the newly opened (as of this morning) Lower Douglas run. Remember that all of the Maple Hill Trail is directional based on the day, and with the completion of this trail all temporary "downhill only" sections are back to normal operation. Time to climb! Also, don't forget about our grand opening party this Thursday (August 17th) at6:30pm (details below.) https://www.facebook.com/SWMMBA/videos/10155316681091154/

Come celebrate and experience the Maple Hill Trail with us on August 17, 2017. Meet the many individuals and sponsors whose generous contributions of time, funds, and materials have made this recreational opportunity possible. Snacks and beverages will be provided by Old Mill Brewpub and Imperial Beverage. *The Maple Hill Trail is directional based on the day of the week. On the day of the grand opening (Thursday) the direction will be counter-clockwise. This trail system is full of advanced features such as banked turns, berms, and tabletops, but most are designed to be rollable at slow speeds by beginner riders. Bypasses are provided around more intimidating features. All skill levels are welcome! Where:  Maple Hill Trail at Markin Glen County Park - 5300 North Westnedge Avenue – West Entrance Schedule: 5:30 p.m. to 6:30 p.m. - Maple Hill Trail dedication ceremony (Maple Hill Trailhead) 6:30 p.m. to 7:30 p.m. - Maple Hill Trail Social Event (West Pavilion) and Trail Ride

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Riders joining the Minion rides acknowledge the inherent risk involved with bicycle riding and by joining any Minion ride hold harmless any rider involved.

THIS IS IT! BLOODY 'ELL 'UNDRED WEEKEND!

OH, THE HUMANITY!

Belo News
August 7, 2017

Zyckmann Estate, Mi. - This is it, mighty Minion Nation! The weekend every Minion has been waiting for!

The Bloody 'ell 'undred is this Saturday and there is still time to get your reservation in!

So what are you waiting for Bunkie?!? Get a note to, or call Gazelle Girl and let her know you're coming! Hell, it is worth it just to see the Zyckmann Estate and to taste those Gazelle Girl Deviled Eggs! Here is all the information you need! And remember, with the Bloody 'ell 'undred going on there is no KK-TdG this Saturday!

SQUEAKY BUYS?!? WOW!

PHOTO FINISH? SO WHO WON?

FOUR FLAT TIRES? SAY IT AIN'T SO!

SKITTLES TO THE RESCUE!

NO KK-TdG THIS SATURDAY!

The Nation ready for the Tour of Central Kalamazoo County!

Belo News
August 7, 2017

Shark Cove, Mi. - As dawn broke bright, and again, cool, over the Shark Cove, our intrepid hero lay in his Shark bed pondering why the summer had seemed so hot and humid, except for Saturday mornings when he would have to put on his fin warmers. "What is with that?" he thought as he slogged down to the Shark Basement and this week actually found his real arm warmers.

The roads were wet, but the radar, as well as the forecast, was predicting good weather!

Squeaky in his winter gear!

Game on!

As our hero launched from the Cove, Yeti Boy was there to greet him, but both doubted anyone else would be meeting them on the way. With the wet roads, they knew they wouldn't see Rainman and there was a good possiblity Nikeboy would not want to get one of his expensive rides wet. The riders were unsure about X-Rod, but he wasn't there as they went by Stone Jug Road where he usually jumps on. No Skittles either as they rode past the Human Society making them both wonder who might be at the start.

However, they did find Skittles and Rose Between Two Thorns who will herin be known as Echo because Rose Between Two Thorns is way too hard to say, at the start. They had ridden over and though they had missed the Sharkman and his entourage and left early.

Riders continued to arrive, including that Style Guy, Squeaky after being gone a few weeks. He was also sporting a new bike jersey (see photo) that everyone will want, now that they have seen Squeaky showing it off to the Tofosi!

Squeaky in his new jersey!
The man was "Stylin!"

Gazelle Girl and Toesetter rode in to cheers from their adoring fans and Stryker Guy was back from his trip to China and only mildly jet lagged. Bissell Boy was there, looking sharp in his non-Bissell Kit as more riders poured in and the sun came out in force.

After the start photo, Sharkman explained the south route was being ridden because of the Shermanator and that he would be offering his $.50 per look tour of all the sights on the Tour of Central Kalamazoo County! Oh, the humanity.

As Sharkman was fending off comments from the unusually snarly peleton, a car pulled in at 7:59 a.m. and the old Shark was heard to mutter, "what part of 8:00 a.m. - SHARP!" did this person not understand!

It was new Minion Shonger and he was given two minutes to get ready! At 8:02 a.m. the mighty Minion Nation pulled out of the station and though Shonger wasn't completely ready, he was able to catch on before the Nation started to head south.

As the train turned on to Miller Road near McDonalds, there was Nikeboy in all of his cycling sartorial splendor! Does this man know how to wear cycling kit or what?!?

Nikeboy! Seriously,
this is the format
Easty sent this photo
to Belo News!
and yes, he is that tall!

This brought the count up to 18 riders on the day.

The Nation headed up Qman Hill and Sharkman took the honorary first sprint after a lead out by B-Rod, Gazelle Girl and Toesetter.

As the ride developed, Sharkman was shouting out the sights and actually was giving some deals in that he offered the waterfall, Tillers Farm and Cook Cemetery, three sights for $1.00. That being $.50 off the regular price he noticed EVERYONE took a look!

Visions of riches danced in his head as they  headed past the rail road house and on to the new pavement on the "Road to Nowhere!"

This newly paved road allowed for the Nation to open up some speed and ride!

As they approached the Stop Sign, they heard "mechanical" and everyone waited. Squeaky had flatted. But never fear, Skittles was on it ASAP and pedaled back to take control as the Nation waited.

As soon as Squeaky and Skittles came back, the Nation started out again only to hear, "Mechanical" again! This time, it was B-Rod! But never fear, Skittles was on it and started asking about pay. Sharkman told him he would split his proceeds on the day from the sight seeing with him! What a great guy! Is this a great country or what?!?

Gazelle Girl and Toesetter's grand entrance!

After B-Rod got his wheel back on, the Nation toured the farm country west and returned to the Road to Nowhere again, where Squeaky's tire went flat a second time. This time, however, it was in the middle to the great Road to Nowhere when the Nation was clicking along at 25 mph! OH, the humanity.

Skittle was on it and again, the Nation headed towards Scots, Michigan.

Squeaky, feeling bad about the tires, and also wanting to celebrate the birth of his 10th Grandchild, said he wanted to buy koffee! What, Squeaky who usually doesn't even stop to have koffee wanted to buy the koffee? Sharkman asked for clarification, as he wasn't sure what he was hearing.

Squeaky said he wanted to buy again, but that he might not have the money and could Sharkman loan it to him?!? Wait, .....what?  Sharkman said sure, of course, wanting the celebrate the special occasion of a 10th grandkid!

Stryker Guy back from China!

However, after two flats, the Squeakmiester wasn't sure he could get back so he decided to go straight down 35th street to get back to the Klutch while the Nation went on.

When the Nation got to the last stop ahead before the famous downhill finish, Sharkman cautioned everyone on how fast the finish was and pleaded for a safe, clean sprint on the day.

Sharkman and Gazelle Girl went to the front and led the runaway train down the fastest, most fun finish in all of cycling!

About half way down the hill, the riders started to make their moves, with Skittles leading the pack, along with Shonger, Kiwi and B-Rod on their wheels.

Sharkman clocked a speed of 38 mph on the down hill and he was being passed!

Sharkman got a second wind and tried to latch on to a wheel so he could see the finish.

As Skittles, Shonger and Kiwi made the turn at the bottom of the hill and while Skittles and Shonger were in front with Kiwi on their wheels, everyone knew it would be close.

Bissell Boy in his none Bissell kit!

As the three bore down on the finish, Kiwi swung to the left, timing it perfectly to catapult out so that the three riders were neck and neck as they crossed the finish! Wow, what a classic!

When asked who took the sprint, in usual Minion fashion Kiwi said he wasn't sure as Skittles and Shonger looked at each other and said they thought Kiwi got it. Class acts, all of them! It's not about the winner, but about the race! Well done!

The Commissioner of Cycling gave all three the win! It was a victory for America!

The Nation had decided to do the obstacle course back to the Klutch by taking the closed bridge, but before they could get to it, a shout of "Mechanical" rang out once again!

This time, it was Gazelle Girl! Oh, the humanity.

The interesting part was that in the previous three flat tires, one or two riders went along with Skittles to help with the tire.

Squeaky, the man of the hour,
checking tubes at the Klutch
after buying for the Nation!

However, in this case, Sharkman looked back and saw at least 10 riders in a circle around their
Sweetheart of the Peleton!" Is this a great country or what!?!

The riders came into town on the Champs le Galesburg to the cheers of the tofosi and paparazzi!

When they got to the Klutch, true to his word, there was Squeaky and much to Sharkman's relief, he did have enough money to buy all the Koffee! Thanks Squeaky and congratulations on all the grandkids!

Everyone seemed to savor Squeaky's koffee as he sat trying to find out who had given him tubes so he could pay them back! What a great Minion!

No one seemed to want to leave as the after glow of a great ride on the southern Field of Dreams known as the Tour of Central Kalamazoo County.......

As the Nation headed out, Sharkman and Yeti Boy ran into Reb on the bridge, who had ridden over to escort the two old guys home.

The Nation waiting in line for
Koffee after the Squeakman bought!

It was another fantastic day in the Minion Nation!

Remember, no KK-TdG this Saturday as the Nation does the Bloody 'ell 'undred!












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Riders joining the Minion rides acknowledge the inherent risk involved with bicycle riding and by joining any Minion ride hold harmless any rider involved.