NATION SAYS GOODBYE TO ONE OF THEIR OWN!

The Nation was ready to say goodbye to Ox!

RIDE OF SILENCE FOR OX!

"A" GROUP WRITE UP?

J-DOG PULLS OFF HAT TRICK!

NATION ROCKS THE TOUR DE TAYLOR!

LUCKY ONE'S LUNCH WRITE UP!

NEEDED: "C" GROUP LEADERS!

BLOODY 'ELL 'UNDRED SAVE THE DATE!

Belo News
June 21, 2017

Shark Cove, Mi. - It has been a wild couple of weeks around the Shark Cove. Off the heals of the Tour de Taylor, the Nation learned that one of their own, the legendary "Ox" had lost his 2 year battle with cancer. Sharkman lost another friend a couple days after.

Returning Minion and newly named
X-Rod!

Our intrepid hero, the Sharkman, was conflicted as to whether to call the ride off, as the funeral for Ox was on Saturday morning. As he pondered this conundrum, he began to wonder what Ox would do. Our intrepid hero knew that Ox would want the Nation to ride and Lava Girl volunteered to pick the old Shark up at the Klutch and take him to the funeral.

Game on! Win-win!

So as dawn broke bright over the Shark Cove and Sharkman launched into the rising sun, he was disappointed that Mad Dog was AGAIN missing. However, that Style Guy the Nation all loves, Nikeboy, met our hero as he rode out of the Cove.

Up the road, a returning Minion, Rod jumped on. Rod had ridden so infrequently he had not been given a Minion Name. Since there was already a B-Rod, and with C-Rod not seeming right, Sharkman quickly named the returning Minion X-Rod! Welcome back to the mighty Shark Minion Nation, X-Rod.

Once again, Sharkman found the start crowded with riders getting their steads ready, with more new riders and faces. Sharkman and the Editors of Belo News are really beginning to have a hard time remembering all the names!

Zyckmann was ready to rock it!

Another, infrequent Minion had returned who did have a Minion Name. Yooper was back and sporting a very cool decal of the "UP" on his bike. Yooper got the name because, well, he is a Yooper! The decal actually looked a bit like a shark! Win-win! Welcome back Yooper!

Also a semi virgin Minion, Danny, was back and was later named Braveheart by Skittles! Welcome back Braveheart!

Though there was a count of 17 at the start, riders continued to pour in all over the course and the riders were numbered at around 25-27. Riders joined on as late as the Feed Zone in Dr. Dave!

Sharkman welcomed new riders, riders returning and gave some brief safety reminders before launching.  Sharkman also announced that the riders would group up at the top of the col de Norte and he would lead them in single file, past Ox's house, who lives on the course, in a ride of silence.

The sweet sound of pedals clicking in resounded throughout the Galesburg morning as the Nation headed to the Klutch, then on to their Field of Dreams known as the KK-TdG.

Occassional Minion Danny, now known
as Braveheart!

At the "A" Group cut off, Skittles led a group of roughly 5-6 riders and later, Kid Doster came past the "B" Group and headed for the "A's".

There was an immediate "Mechanical" when Boatman flatted, just before Sharkman took the first sprint under a yellow caution flag.

Boatman reported that he was going to go to Ox's funeral as well so told the Nation go on. It was learned later that his second tube flatted and someone from the "A" Group gave him another tube. Sharkman was pleased to report that he sat next to Boatman at the funeral so he did make it!

There were no riders for the "C" Group as the Nation passed the "C" Group cut off and rode through the Yorkville Church/Kellogg Korner/Kountry Klub section where another new Minion jumped on by the name of Clark Johnson. Welcome to the Nation!

At the summit of the Col de Norte, Sharkman got the Nation lined up and instructed that they would be riding single file, until the Holy Rollers. They would be riding past Ox's House, which is on the course known as the KK-TdG and that he would point to the house as they passed in silence to remember their fellow Minion.

Yooper was back aftter
couple of years absence!

To Sharkman's amazement, the Minions listened to instructions as he rode a steady 20 mph pace towards Ox's house. Even more amazingly, the Nation stayed silent for the entire stretch of road.

As Sharkman got to the house, he pointed to where Ox lived and then pointed up to the sky and several (if not all) Minions followed suit, remembering a great rider and great Minion. A fitting goodbye to one of our own.

We leave no Minion behind and Ox will ride on with the Nation in our hearts.

The ride continued and the Nation rode through the Holy Rollers, the Feed zone on to the Digital Divide, where the "A" Group caught on with the Nation.

Skittles did a write up that now follows.....






Minion Ride A Group Report

Yoopers, Yooper decal!
Almost looks like a deformed shark?

Belo News
Skittles

The A Group split off in the usual place with Skittles taking the first pull in front of Ironman, Falcon, Wunderbread, and a New Minion we’re calling Braveheart, and two other guys (sorry, can't remember names), eventually collecting Kid Doster along the way.  The group discussed and mutually decided to take turns pulling instead of sprinting for each stop sign.  

Braveheart took the lead following the Group’s rejoining the regular Minion Route and held the pace up around, oh, I don't know:  warp speed.  Skittles found himself towards the back of the group and finally made the front going up to M43 and with that much rest decided to pull with everything he had to average about 25mph for that section.  

Braveheart pulled the group up until Williams Rd, with Skittles out of the saddle and taking the lead at full throttle up his favorite sprint point on the Minion Ride. 

The Nation on the move!
courtesy of Nikeboy.

The A Ride continued on with no lack of pace, Skittles, Wunderbread and Ironman each taking turns pulling along at full throttle several times but the star of the day was definitely New Minion Braveheart.  Each of his several pulls were so fast it was as if he were attempting to force the earth to rotate in the opposite direction and therefore turn back time.  Superman did that once.  

Scary moment on the southern tip of Gull Lake when Ironman began shouting “ WHOA WHOA WHOA!!!” As a minivan backed out of its parking spot and nearly took out the entire A Group before slamming on its brakes.  

Braveheart took one final, longer and even faster pull to get the A Group caught up to the B Group, just prior to the M89 crossing to average just over 21mph.  

Coming up to the GGG Spot sprint, Skittles was in the lead again, head down, riding as fast and aero as possible. He was shocked, I say: SHOCKED to see Gazelle Girl come (around) so fast at the G Spot.  With a gentle lead out from Skittles followed by Ironman pushing her hard from behind, she took her ceremonial sprint and all was right with the Nation.

It was a victory for America!

Thanks Skittles for your "riveting" review of the ride!

The "Sweetheart of the Peloton!"

The entire Nation, "A" and "B" groups were together for the final ascent to the finish.

A fast moving pace line formed up almost immediately after the Nation got onto 37th and continued to build speed (see photos) as they went into the last hill before the finish. The "A" Rider were at the front, the "B" Riders were holding and enjoying the ride!

It is unclear as to all those involved in that final sprint, but J-Dog, once again took the final sprint, making it three weeks in a row. The coveted Hat Trick had been accomplished!

The fans went wild on the Champs le Galesburg at the riders zipped up their jerseys and waved to the paparazzi and tofosi.

Lava Girl was waiting, with a change of clothes for our hero, who was like Superman, getting out of his super hero jersey and into his sports coat and tie for the funeral.

Sharkman, as well as Zyckmann and Boatman made it to the funeral on time to pay respects for the Nation!

Kiwi was back!

This should get back to normal on this weeks KK-TdG!

Saturday, June 24, 2017

Beer Jersey Day!

That's right, Bunkie! There hasn't been a Beer Jersey Day this season so break out your favorite beer jersey and wear it in pride!

Launch Time - 8:00 a.m. - SHARP!

Be there!

Gecko was back!

Lava Girl joins the Nation!

Wildman and Dr. Dave enjoying a kup!

It was a great day in the Nation!
Courtesy of Nikeboy.

NATION ROCKS THE TOUR DE TAYLOR!

Minions at the Tour de Taylor!

Belo News
June 10, 207

Mattawan, Mi. - As dawn barely broke over the Shark Cove, we find our intrepid hero backing the Honda/Sharkmobile out of the drive with his four banger rack on the back. Sharkman was the bus drive for several Minions on the morning and as he sipped his koffee, he headed of to Yeti Boys spread, the Bread House, to pick him up. He was waiting in the drive, ready to rock!

Next stop, Mad Dog's, who was also waiting in front of his garage door as the morning began to break even brighter.

Team Taylor Minions! Thanks guys!

Next stop was the car wash near McDonald's just of I-94 at the Galesburg exit, where Ironman was waiting with his bike!

Game on!

When Sharkman and his entourage arrived at the start to register, they were greeted by DJ, TJ Seiwert announced their arrival on the P.A. System! Wow! Kia Pet also ran up to say hello as did Mo Pink! Both Bounty Hunter, Nickhead and the famous Iceman shouted out greetings to the Nation! Class act, those Team Taylor Minions!

After check in, more Minions arrived and a group photo was taken while a number of the Team Taylor Minions continued to greet the crowd and the Nation.

Even Sharkman goes to the bathroom....
or port o potty. Whatever......

A bunch of photos were taken and though only about 14 Minion are in the photo, it was estimated that there were well over 20 Minions riding. Several rode the shorter routes, like Easty and Greyhound due to commitments, and others, like Dragonfly and Cheddar Head rode with different groups.

As the Nation pulled out of the start, several people, noticing the jersey's, shouted out to the Minion Nation as they passed by.

The Nation stayed together through the rest station in Decatur, before heading south to face "the Wall."

For those who are not familiar with "the Wall," as you ride out of the very flat terrain that is Decatur, and past Harley's Topless Bar, it is difficult to fathom the hill that lay ahead. As riders head south out of Decatur on this very flat road, the ridge ahead looms but riders do not realize they have to climb it.

TJ, the DJ, welcoming the Nation!

As the Nation made it's way around the final bend, the hill known as "the Wall" came into view and a collective breath could be heard as the Nation looked up at it. Though unsure of the percent of incline, suffice it to say, this is one step, long hill.

Minions said goodbye to one another saying, "see you at the top!?" As Sharkman stated he would watch over the rear of the peloton. It was decided that the Nation would form back up at the top, at the first stop sign.

As one would expect, the Nation splintered as they looked like fly's climbing a wall looking for the top and praying their hearts wouldn't explode before getting to the top!

It was after the climb that things began to come apart for the mighty Minion Nation!

B-Rod, having not ridden much since knee surgery, began to experience bad cramping in his legs on the climb. At the stop, several riders mentioned there was a rest stop ahead, so Sharkman told the Nation to go on and he would wait for B-Rod.

As Sharkman attempted to pull B-Rod, he could only get up to certain speeds before the leg cramping would start again. Luckily, the strong winds that the Nation rode against on the way out, were now at their backs, which helped.

These guys rock!

As Sharkman and B-Rod came up to a Stop Sign, there was Bro-Man, along with other Minions repairing a flat tire. Once the tire was back in operation, the riders moved on to the rest stop, where the rest of the Nation was waiting and Bro-Man was able to get a floor pump to top off his tire.

Right after the rest stop, Bro-Man's tire flatted again and B-Rod was still having leg cramps.

10-4 and some other riders offered to stay with both Bro-Man and B-Rod to get them to the next rest station while the Nation rode on.

Mo-Pink fist bumping our hero at the start!

Ironman and Mad Dog pushed the pace while Sharkman stayed back with Minions who seemed to falter, then get a second wind and shoot back.

It was at the about this time that Sharkman learned that the ride was not 100K, but 110K or 68 miles! What the.......

He was informed it was always this way, but Sharkman and many other Minions didn't realize this until about the 40 mile marker!

After the final rest stop, the Nation returned to the hills they fought at the start and those extra 6 miles seemed very long!

The Nation arrived back at the start, the crowds were great! Kia Pet ran up to let the Nation know they had saved some pulled BBQ pork for them. They were even greeted with iced towels to cool off! Is this a great country or what!?!

Bro-Man's first of 3 flat's!

The lunch was outstanding and as the Shark and his entourage finished up, 10-4 and B-Rod were coming in and 10-4 reported that after Bro-Man had his third flat, he stopped at a rest station and someone was driving out to get him. Sharkman did follow up with Bro-Man later in the week and he was fine, though disappointed he couldn't finish the ride. He was riding particularly strong on the day and still made about 50 miles, but like a true Minion, wanted to finish the ride! Of course, waiting at a rest station for over an hour isn't much fun either!

The Tour de Taylor is a fantastic event and we hope that even more Shark Minions can make it next year! Remember, it is for the kids!

Thanks Team Taylor for a fantastic day!

A cast of thousands help Bro-Man.

Wildman can put down the BBQ Pork!

This guy is no slacker on the BBQ either!

Mad Dog, Ironman and Buff putting it down!

Zyckmann's wood bike was a big hit!

RETIREE'S LUNCH RIDE

Belo News

Sharkman, Gazelle Girl, and Zyckmann enjoying the
ambiance of the Walldorff!

June 13, 2017
Gazelle Girl

Zyckmann Estate, Mi. - With temps approaching 90 on a partly cloudy Tuesday morning, three brave Minions struck out from Zychmann's Gull Lake Flowerland for a Retiree's Lunch Ride to Hastings.

So as not to be thought of as "old" folks in spite of their retired status, Zychmann set a peppy pace that got the riders to The Walldorff in just a little over an hour.

With a history of spotty customer service at The Walldorff, Zychmann warned us that we would be greeted by one of two waitresses - one named Surly and the other named Surly 2. Instead, we were greeted by a woman I might call Surly Wannabe. Perhaps she was formerly employed by Ed Debevic's - the famous Chicago diner known for their "service with a smirk" and a "side order of sass." When I mentioned I needed a bit more time to decide what cheesy, greasy item to select from the menu Surly Wannabe replied, "I'm here 'til 5." Ouch. I didn't dare ask her to tell me more about the goat cheese/pesto pizza for fear that her response would be something akin to "What part don't you get."

The beer flowed, as did the conversation. We're truly hoping that the pretty young couple playing a serious game of canasta at the next table wasn't eavesdropping. If so, surly the chat coming from these three "bikers" was a topic of conversation when they met their pals for some lively chess later in the evening. "You wouldn't believe what these old people were talking about at lunch today!" Retired Minions have nothing to hide!

The trip back was considerably more tame with our bellies full of dark beer and cheesy, greasy menu items. The scenery was gorgeous - is gorgeous - out that way. And the trio looks forward to another adventure some time next month. We'll publicize it here and would be delighted to have others join in the fun.

BLOODY 'ELL 'UNDRED SAVE THE DATE!

Belo News
June 21, 2017

Triple Nasty Ranchero, Mi.- Don't forget to "Save the Date" for this years Bloody 'Ell 'Undred (BEU)!

Mark those Shark Minion Calendars for Saturday August 12, 2017 now!

Sharkman seems to have lost his BEU Jersey and is ripping the Shark Cove apart looking for it!

Oh, the humanity!