Wednesday, September 4, 2013

THE SHARKMAN RETURNS!
The Sharkman returns!

NURSE RYAN EDGES B-ROD!

La CHOUFFE BEER JERSEY? VERY CHIC!

COLLEGE GAME DAY THIS WEEKEND! 

WEAR YOUR FAVORITE COLLEGE JERSEY!


Belo News
August 31, 2013

Shark Cove, Mi. - As dawn broke over the Shark Cove, our intrepid hero, the Sharkman, was happy to be sleeping in his own shark bed.  As anyone in cycling knows, our hero had been out of town for three successive Saturday's!  This has been the longest he has been away from his beloved Nation and he was ready to get back in the peloton!

Charles the Elder
As the old Shark looked out his window, he saw signs of life at the Rainman Estate and knew the young Minion was going to make the call for the early ride.  Rainman had petitioned our hero to start the ride a half hour later due to less light, but the young Minion was reminded that it is still August and the time move might be a week or two away.

Sharkman was particularly excited to don his new "Bloody 'Ell 'Undred jersey, which he had picked up from Gazelle Girl earlier in the week.  He was "looking good" on this fine summer morning!

As the two riders launched from the Cove, Nikeboy jumped on and then they were three.  All three wondered if they would find Mad Dog along the route, but to no avail (more on this later).

Galesburg was buzzing as the three approached the Klutch.  Luann was posted at the side door waving at the three, as the Saturday Morning Koffee Group was cheering from the front of the Klutch!  And the ride hadn't even started yet!
Charles the Second

At the start, the riders started to pour in, donned in both beer jersey's AND their Bloody 'Ell 'Undred jersey's!

Hoosier Boy was getting his bike out of the car and was asked why he didn't ride over as he usually does.  Sipping his coffee, he stated that the Triathlon he was supposed to have been in got cancelled and at the last minute he decided to come on over to ride with the Nation!

There were three (if not more) new Minions on their first rides in the Nation.  Charles the Elder, Charles the Second and Tim (name to be determined).  Welcome to the Nation, Minion virgins!

Additionally, some Team riders form Styker and WSI had come to join the fun.

New Minion Tim







Back, after a hiatus, were both the Cannon, Nurse Ryan and Polar Bear, the latter wearing his BEU jersey and looking fast!
Polar Bear looking fast in his BEU Jersey!

Beer Jersey winner of the day was our own Skipper, wearing a La Chouffe Belgium beer jersey that he had procured from the Pirate.  We can only assume that the Pirate also has one and will be wearing at the next beer jersey day in an attempt to win.  However, only one winner per jersey.  Sorry Pirate…..  Skipper rode in with Bissell Boy, sporting his BEU jersey and also looking fast on that Pinarello!

A long lost Minion from Indiana who rides with the Nation when he visits his parents, Adam was also in the mix for the day and brought a new Minion with him!  Welcome back Adam!  

Brewman was looking good in his black and white Brew Kit and also sporting a fantastic engraved headset top (see photo!)! Engraved on the headset cap was "Brewman!"  Has this guy got class or what?  Easty was also present wearing a nifty black and white kit that looked like Brewman's, minus the beer theme.
Cannon on point to fix flats and lead out!

Yeti Boy arrived and the Sharkman attempted to help him with a tire issue, however just before the Skipper began to start the Nation off, the bead on Yeti Boy's tire was showing the exposed tube again.  The Cannon, expert mechanic that he is, stepped forward and quickly corrected the situation and the Skipper led the Nation out through downtown.

At least 22 riders (hard to get a count) were stopped by the light in front of the Klutch and Luann came out to wish everyone a safe ride as the Saturday Morning Koffee Group waved to the colorful field of riders as the light changed and they moved on.

Sharkman, feeling much better than he expected after being off the bike for so long, was led out by B-Rod and the two opened up a gap from the talkative Minions.

As they headed north Ironman and Gazelle Girl jumped on to a shout from Sharkman to both!  (Ironman always wines about how Gazelle Girl gets the shout out and and he doesn't so Sharkman didn't want any hurt feeling AGAIN!) Unfortunately, due to the gap, Sharkman was the only one who shouted out the greeting.

The Skipper in his "La Chouffe" Jersey!
Wanting to honor the first sprint, Sharkman took it up to 25 mph as he crossed the first sprint!

Sharkman took a count of riders and came up with around 24 as they crossed G ave.

The morning was warm but the hazy sky kept the Nation from overheating.  Some of the team riders who had joined on pushed the pace a bit at the front, but everyone played nice through the col de Twin Lakes and on to the Yorkville Church, where the road had been recently chip and sealed.

The pace picked up through Kellogg Korner and the Kountry Klub as the Nation broke up a bit at a very high pace, but all came back together at the Rt. 43 stop sign.  Just before the sign there was a horse trailer parked with a woman waiting for something, which initiated a number of pretty bad horse jokes from the peloton, particularly Sharkman, Gazelle Girl and Easty.

As the Nation crested the col de Norte, Ranger Rick and Kid Doster jumped on.  They reported that they had ridden to the Yorkville Church and thought they were behind the Nation, however the late start from Galesburg had actually put them ahead of the Nation.  So thinking they were behind, they went across to the east side of the lake to ride north to meet the Nation!
Beer Jersey Winner!

Also, somewhere in this section and unbeknownst to our hero, the intrepid Zickman jumped on.

As the Nation went past the Zickman Estate, Sharkman led the peloton in shouts of "Where are you, Zickman?" and "Hey Zickman, rustle us up some bacon and Beer!"  only to ride a bit further and find Zickman in the peloton!  Zickman reported that he shouted along with the Nation as they lifted their voices to his Estate only to have him ride up and say hello to the surprised Sharkman.

Other Team riders also joined on in this section and Sharkman estimated the total riders at that point to be around 30-31.  One of the riders was Joe from CMS/Stryker who quietly jumped on somewhere during the ride.

Shortly after coming together after the Holy Rollers and Frona's, a rider had a flat tire and once again, Cannon was on it in a second and had the new tube on in record breaking time!  Thank you Cannon!

Brewmans cool engraved headcap!
As the Nation crossed the Digital Divide, Sharkman noted an average speed of 19.3 mph.  A nice, double pace line seemed to form up and as they approached the GGG spot, several of the team riders moved to the front.

At the GGG spot crossing, Sharkman gave his usual lecture on worrying about the finish due to all the riders and particularly, sprinters, and not having the Tow Truck, Chico or Hossman to string out the peloton. Sharkman also noted that the average speed had moved up to 19.7 mph!

However, after the crossing, Joe from Styker went to the front and uncorked an amazing pull all the way to the top of the final ascent to the finish leaving Minions gasping behind him!

With a cast of thousands on his wheel, Joe pulled while the Cannon, Rainman, Nurse Ryan, B-Rod and others started to move to the front to take over.

Joe, Cannon and Rainman did a nice job of spreading out the Nation as Nurse Ryan and B-Rod fought it out to the final with Nurse Ryan edging out the win.

Unfortunately, in the confusion, Belo News was unable to determine who took the third spot on  the podium.

Average speed on the morning was clocked at 20.1 mph, most of which came over the last two sprints of the day!  Oh, the humanity!
Joe signing autographs at the Klutch!

The fans went wild on the Champs le Galesburg as the heroes zipped up their jersey's for the paparazzi and tofosi's lining the street.

Luann was ready for the masses as Bissell Boy was the first to the counter, threw down a $20 and told Luann he was buying for the first $15 worth (which included the old Shark) and leaving a $5 for her!  What a Minion!  Is this a great country or what!?!?  Pure class.....

Talk centered around how Mad Dog was doing and if he was O.K.  Belo News is pleased to report that Mad Dog is on the mend and would have been back but contracted a pretty bad cold and decided to rest and try to knock it out before returning to the Nation.  He reports that he is appreciative of the concern and hopes to be back next Saturday!

This Saturday!  September 7, 2013!

The Klutch was rocking!
It's College Game Day!  Yep, it is time for college football so get out your favorite college jersey to ride in!  Show your pride and let's see which college get's the most jerseys this year!  MSU has been a consistent winner of this contest and the Big Ten always wins the conference, so get out there this week with your jersey!

Launch time 8:00 a.m. - SHARP! 

BE THERE!



SASQUATCH DOES THE WALL!
Sasquatch does "the Wall!"

Belo News
September 1, 2013

East Jordan, Mi. - While the mighty Nation was riding the Beer/BEU jersey ride, another Minion was showing his colors at the DALMAC ride up north.  Sasquatch checks in with this photo of him not only completing the wall, but doing it in his Bloody 'Ell 'Undred jersey!  Is he a great Minion or what?!?

In his own words;

"I know I missed last week but that doesn't mean I wasn't out riding.  Last weekend I rode the Dalmac bicycle ride and represented the Minion's by wearing "Bloody 'Ell 'Undred" jersey.  Attached is a picture of me after completing "The Wall" in East Jordan, MI."

You made the Nation proud Sasquatch!  Hope to see you back in the peloton next week!



SEASON STANDINGS!

Belo News
September 1, 2013

Shark Cove, Mi. - It is very hard to believe that the season is almost over.  As all Minions are aware, the road season ends the last weekend in September and moves to Ft. Custer in October so that the Nation can start to get ready for the Iceman Cometh in November.  As in past years, watch for announcements on rides at the Ft. in October starting the second week in October.

With the season winding down, it is once again time to post the season standings.  It was a great year for the Nation and with each passing season the mighty Minion Nation seems to grow larger and more competitive.  This season was no exception and here are the top ten riders for the 2013 season in descending order;

1.  Sharkman
2.  Some Minion
3.  Some Minion
4.  Some Minion
5.  Some Minion
6.  Some Minion
7.  Some Minion
8.  Some Minion
9.  Some Minion
10. Some Minion

Yes, once again the mighty Sharkman finishes the season in first place.  He is so far ahead in points, he cannot lose and has been declared the season champion.  

Actually, that makes 8 years in a row!  And that, is why he is the Nation's hero!



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