TEAM TAYLOR RULES!
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| More Bissell Boy wanna be's! |
BOFFO SIGHTING!
ADDITIONAL BISSELL BOY IMPERSONATOR ALLEGATIONS?
PIRATE FILES ANOTHER TOUR DE FRANCE REPORT!
It's Decided! Kia Pet it is!
Belo News
May 11, 2013
Shark Cove, Mi. - As the shafts of sunlight began to shed a soft glow on our hero, the Sharkman's bed, he awoke thinking about how cold it might be on the field of dreams every Minion has come to know as the Koffee Klutch Tour de Gull. It appeared that cold weather had come back to paradise and though not as cold as previous weeks, none the less cold.
As the garage door lifted at the Cove, Nikeboy was waiting to ride over to the start and moments later, Mad Dog rolled in, but no Rainman.
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| Hoosier Boy returns with Starbucks! |
The old Shark wore his rain cover over to keep warm, but quickly shed it when he found he was sweating as he and his companions glided up to the start where Ranger Rick and Hoosier Boy were waiting. Yes, Hoosier Boy had returned to the peloton to make his season debut after riding through the drive up window at a Starbucks. The man actually pulled the coffee from his water bottle cage and sipped with a grin.
Nikeboy had to head back to unfortunately attend a funeral, but he was added into the count for the ride anyway!
Moments later, the Team Taylor contingent arrived led by the Iceman himself along with Nickhead and Kia Pet. They had brought along DPS, who apparently attended the Minion ride last year when the nation had to turn back due to incredible lightening. This would be his official full ride, so welcome DPS!
Squeaky, Styker Guy, Brewman, Sasquatch, Toast and Wildman were in attendance and Belo News
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| Iceman, Kia Pet, DPS & Nickhead arrive! |
Sharkman was pleased to note that no Minions arrived at 8:28 a.m. and the train was ready to pull from the station at 8:30 a.m. - SHARP!
Luann was at her post and shouted out "Stay warm!" to the passing Minion Nation.
As the train headed north, they were greeted by Gazelle Girl as she rode up to her expected cheer from the peloton!
Ranger Rick and Hoosier Boy were quick to lead our hero out and then Kia Pet came up and almost blew Sharkman off his wheel, but managed to get our hero to the sprint with room to spare.
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| Hoosier Boy and Squeaky stretching before the ride! |
Squeaky took the sprint in the run up to the col de Twin Lakes and Mad Dog blew the field away on the col de Twin Lakes climb to take the next sprint.
As had happened in the previous week, the Nation rode through the Yorkville Church/Kellogg Korner/Kountry Klub section in a nice pace line before a group split off the front at the turn.
As the Nation made the turn on to the road to Rt. 43, Ranger Rick and Mad Dog lead out with Nickhead and Sharkman hanging on for dear life. Ranger Rick pulled hard before Mad Dog took over and Nickhead stayed with him before making his move. Sharkman reached into his suitcase of courage and sat in behind Nickhead waiting to make his move. Nickhead had closed the gap to Mad Dog and Ranger Rick and was riding on the rivets as Sharkman made his move and nipped him at the line to take the sprint! Sharkman gave Nickhead a big thanks for the lead out as they climbed the short, steep hill up to the Rt. 43 stop sign.
As the peloton came back together at Rt. 43 Gazelle Girl offered some "chalk talk" concerning group etiquette that Belo News felt should needed to be shared with the Nation.
Gazelle Girl mentioned that she was somewhat "cooked" as the speed picked up in the Kountry Klub section and caught her off guard at the back. She stated that Iceman had come around her and then came in front so that she could grab his wheel to catch back on to the peloton. As veteran riders all know, if you lose that wheel in front of you it can be extremely hard to get back on to the group.
Smooth move by Iceman, always a class act, and a reminder to the Nation that the Minions are all for one and one for all! Sharkman also mentioned that it was good to see that the Nation must have read some of the blog as the circling in intersections and early crossings have stopped.
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| Iceman hizzelf! |
There was no stopping at the top of the col de Norte as the Nation was riding smooth and together on this beautiful sunny spring morning that was warming up nicely.
The Minions stayed together through the Holy Rollers and as the Nation rode up to Frona's, Hossman came out of the restaurant to say hello, sans bike! He was enjoying a nice breakfast with his family. Mmmmm wondering if he bought an extra pair of road shoes to leave there? (see last weeks edition)
The Nation formed into a pace line after crossing the Digital Divide and it turned into a horse race at the end where Iceman and Nickhead fought it out with Iceman taking the GGG spot by a fine frogs hair. Nickhead was saving something for that last sprint!
Sharkman reminded the group to make sure they held their lines as they headed to the finish. He was again worried about a group finish and the accompanying possibility of crashes.
Mad Dog, Ranger Rick, Iceman and others jumped out to take the front but the group seemed to want to stay together until Sharkman decide to throw himself on his sword and shot to the front.
Sharkman quickly opened a big gap back to the peloton and as he looked in his Shark rear view mirror and as he started wondering, "why aren't they coming after me?" he realized the they all KNEW they could reel the old Shark back in. The peloton didn't seem at all worried.....
As Sharkman scrambled up the final hill and began to gas out, the peloton quickly caught our hero and went by him like he was standing still!
As the Nation bore down on the final sprint, Nickhead went to the front to battle it out with Toast and Brewman and that is how it finished! A victory for Team Taylor and revenge for Nickhead on the day!
Average speed for the ride was clocked at 18.6 mph but everyone seemed to feel it was faster.
The tofosi and paparazzi went wild on the Champs le Galesburg as the heroes marched home to the Klutch for the press conference.
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| Sharkman & Boffo the Clown! |
The Nation was pleased to find none other than Boffo, that irascible clown, signing autographs and pleasing the crowd with, well, clown stuff! Actually, Boffo has been out of the peloton so long that if he came back he would be considered a celebrity rider! As he sat down, Toast baptized him with his koffee creamer but fortunately it didn't seem to stain Boffo's clown outfit.
Iceman bought koffee for our hero and then gave a brief description of the upcoming Tour de Taylor Ride on June 15 (more on this below).
Discussion turned to the name contest for Kia Pet. Gazelle Girl shared how much she liked that name over Lizard Man and the Nation seemed to agree. Actually, the general contention was that a name like that could act as a real "chick magnet" if you get our drift.
Sharkman, never one to beat around the bush, and not having received any checks for $50, put it to a vote right then and there.
The vote was unanimous and therefore the name Kia Pet is now set in Minion Lore! Is this a great country or what?!? Ya gotta love a name like Kia Pet!
You won't want to miss this weeks edition of the KK-TdG!
Saturday, May 18, 2013
Launch Time - 8:30 a.m. - SHARP!
Be there!
ADDITIONAL ALLEGATIONS OF BISSELL BOY IMPERSONATORS ROLL IN!
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| Who are these guys? Don't they look just like Bissell Boy? |
Belo News
May 11, 2013
Galesburg, Mi. - More allegations have come into the Commissioner's Office concerning the blatant impersonating of the legendary rider, Bissell Boy. It appeared that not only Sharkman had been observed in the attempt, but now Iceman and Stryker Guy were jumping on the band wagon, both claiming that they "want to be like Bissell Boy."
Apparently there is a major concern in the Nation that Bissell Boy is not returning to the peloton and this is a poor attempt by some delusional Minions to placate the thought of no more Bissell Boy. However, Belo News has confirmed his return and can assure everyone that he will be back soon, though he could not be reached for comment this week.
Could he be out at the Amgen Tour of California with the Bissell Team? They have been outstanding the past few days taking the King of the Mountain jersey and being in several break aways. Bissell Rider Chris Baldwin, who was raised in Battle Creek, was out in front of the peloton most of today's stage.
Could he be out at the Amgen Tour of California with the Bissell Team? They have been outstanding the past few days taking the King of the Mountain jersey and being in several break aways. Bissell Rider Chris Baldwin, who was raised in Battle Creek, was out in front of the peloton most of today's stage.
The race is being televised daily at 5 p.m - 7 p.m. on the NBC Sports network.
Belo news will stay with this breaking story to continue to report on any and all allegations concerning the ongoing epidemic of Bissell Boy impersonating!
PIRATE REPORTS IN FROM SPAIN!
Belo News
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| The Pirate in Spain! |
May 12, 2013
Valls, Spain - Another great weekend from Spain. 140 miles in 3 days plus 1800 feet elevation change. Tried my hand at climbing the big one with 10% grade but just ran out of fuel, had to walk twice. Oh well it is only preparation and motivation when I really get into the mountains.
Pirate signing off from Spain!
(It should be noted that the Pirate did bring another jersey AND he has apparently stopped impersonating Bissell Boy after being contacted by Bissell Boy's European Legal Counsel.)
BATTLE CREEK NAMED A "BIKE FRIENDLY CITY!"
Belo News
May 13, 2013
Battle Creek, Mi. - This is Bike Week and no better time to learn that Battle Creek has been named a "Bike Friendly City" by the League of American Bicyclists! Our hero, the Sharkman, has been involved in a City Committee to achieve this designation and after submitting the very detailed application, Battle Creek was given "Honorable Mention" so that they can now begin working for greater status on the tier level of Bronze, Silver, Gold and a new level of Platinum.
Between now and July 1, 2013, the League will work with the City to determine what steps need to be made to move to the different levels. Only 6 Cities in Michigan have this designation and now Battle Creek is among them!
Congratulations Battle Creek!
TUESDAY NIGHT CHAIN GANG REPORT!
Belo News
May 7,2013
Battle Creek, Mi. - The winds were blowing Tuesday night and that can only mean it is time for the Tuesday Night Chain Gang Ride!
Sharkman and Airman arrived early and had concerns that they were the only riders who would be in attendance to fight the crazy winds. Airman was really nervous as Sharkman reminded him that as a Minion it was his duty to do most of the pulling. Airman was saved as Mad Dog showed up and the trio started out west into the wind.
As they rode, they quickly realized the wind was mostly out of the north and actually seemed to be helpful both west and east!
Riding at a nice pace they zipped by the Tuesday Night Time Trail course where it looked like they were having a record breaking night full of riders who were being attacked by a mass of mosquito's!
Hutch and Nikeboy were in attendance and Nikeboy actually passed the pace line as the Minions rode along.
Despite only three riders and the wind, the trio was able to turn in a 20.6 mph average on the night!
If you like to work on speed and pace line technique, this is the ride for you!
Tuesday Nights!
5:45 p.m. Starts for May
Kellogg HQ Upper Parking lot
Be there!
TOUR DE TAYLOR JUNE 15, 2013
Belo News
May 11, 2013
Galesburg, Mi. - Last year was the inaugural of the Tour de Taylor ride and several Minions, including Sharkman and Lava Girl took part. This is a fund raiser for Team Taylor and their quest to raise funds for the Make a Wish Foundation and the WAM ride coming up in July. Many of the Nation are also members of Team Taylor and our own Sharkman has ridden with the team on the WAM three times.
Because of the close relationship of the mighty Minion Nation and Team Taylor, there will be no ride on June 15, 2013 so the Nation can take part in this great ride!
Unfortunately, Sharkman cannot ride this year due to a family obligation in Illinois, but he is encouraging the Nation to go to the attached site and sign up today. Last year many of the Nation rode the 62 mile ride together and reported having a great time followed by an incredible catered lunch. There are also 12 and 31 mile courses.
If enough Minions are interested Belo News will list at time so that the Nation can ride together so watch Belo News for more information.
Tour de Taylor is coming up on June 15th! http://www.tourdetaylor.org/
Be there!
MOTOR CITY BIKE RIDE JUNE 22, 2013
Belo News
May 14, 2013
Detroit, Mi. - Yet another opportunity for the Nation is the Motor City Bike Ride on June 22, 2013 that Belo News has been promoting the past few weeks. A close friend of the Sharkman has asked to post this great charity ride for those who might want to make a trip over to the east side of the State to enjoy some Motor City hospitality! This ride is limited to 150 riders so if you are interested, don't wait. All the information is available at;
Facebook Page - http://www.facebook.com/events/430264013735265/
WANT ADS:
Looking for a new pair of wheels? Want to go fast and look good doing it?
Well, here is your chance, Bunkie!
One of the Minions has a pair of pretty sweet Zipp wheels for sale for $900.
Take a look at these baby's!
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