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| The mighty Shark Minion Nation lined up for the start! Photo by Yeti Boy |
SHARK MINIONS ROCK PLAYERS!
SHARK MINIONS ROCK!
REB "TORQUES" HIS CHAIN OFF?!!!
I OWE BEER DELIVERS!
COTTAGE CHEESE, ........A DOLLAR?!!!
WHAT THE........?
BARRY-ROUBAIX REPORT?
IRONMAN AND KID DOSTER CHECK IN!
OH, THE HUMANITY! IT'S THE END OF THE SEASON!
Belo News
November 3, 2019
Augusta Mi. - It was time, once again, for the 5th Annual "In Lieu of Iceman" Ride/Party!
That annual event that every non Iceman contestant awaits!
AND it did not disappoint!
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| Yeti Boy and....well a Yeti.....and a Yeti Bike (Gazelle Girls). |
The the weather forecast sucked most of the week, and there was scattered rain in the early afternoon, but 10 hearty Shark Minion's showed up to ride and an 11th (Hoosier Boy) came later!
Is this a great country or what?!?
In addition to Sharkman and Yeti Boy, Gazelle Girl, Toesetter, Reb, Zyckmannn, Brewman, I Owe Beer, Skittles and Hambone filled out the roster! It was a cornucopia of the Shark Minion Nation.
After Yeti Boy took a start photo, the riders signed some autographs, and the Governor made a few remarks, Sharkman shouted out that he would take up the rear! Primarily because he was out of shape after a month off the bike after his encounter with a very vicious box cutter AND he had to ride his fat bike because his beloved 9er had a flat and need to be "re-energized" with that white goo stuff he hates!
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| Adult beverage anyone? |
Meanwhile, Skittles was on a single speed and Gazelle Girl and Toesetter were rocking their new rides! Gazelle Girl on her new Yeti and Toesetter on his new Trek, both dual suspension!
Is this a great country or what!??
It was a reverse trail day and the Shark Minion Nation took off on the Red Trail, with Toesetter in the lead and aiming to transfer to the Green midway. However, he then realized that since it was reverse day, they could not enter the Green Trail where it meets the Red, just before the Amusement Park. The line of Shark Minion riders had to continue on the Red Trail till the end.
No problem!
Sharkman fought to stay on, and though Yeti Boy, I Owe Beer and Reb did not seem to have a problem with their fat bikes, Sharkman was paying for a month off the bike!
Oh, the humanity!!!
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| The Nation rocks Players! |
The Nation had some time left on the clock, but they did want to allow time for adult beverage consumption post ride. Therefore, it was agreed that they would ride, what has come to be known as, the "Sharkman Loop" before wrapping up.
The "Sharkman Loop" is a run through the Trenches, then backtracking to the start of the Green that links to the Crazy Beaver. However, on this day it would be ridden in reverse!
Zyckmann, Skittles and Toesetter took off with the Nation in hot pursuit with the old Shark hanging on, yet again, for all he was worth (and that ain't much!)!
As the Nation headed up the first big hill in the Crazy Beaver section and with Yeti Boy right on Reb's tail, a loud "snap" was heard and low and behold, Reb's chain had broke.
This stopped Yeti, who was right on his butt, but Sharkman had enough room to go around, leaving them like so much garbage on the side of the road.....hee hee.....!
As Sharkman caught up to the ride leaders he reported the chain break and an immediate debate began on whether it was from Reb "torquing" and "muscling" up the hill, or if he had started to put on some "winter weight?"
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| Fire, Reb in his special T, and Hoosier Boy who rode late! |
As the Nation pulled up to the Green, they noticed a giant Yeti/Sasquatch/Big Foot silhouette that cried out "get a photo of Yeti Boy with this thing!" It was believed to have been put up by the mushers who were in the park on the day.
After the photo op, the Nation took off again and before long, Sharkman couldn't see Yeti up ahead and just decided to ride it in, in a less than oxygen deficient pace......
However, as he turn off the Green to head to the Trenches, he couldn't see anyone! Where did they go? Where was Yeti Boy?
When he pulled into the Trail Head, everyone asked where Yeti Boy was? Yeti is somewhat famous for taking wrong turns on the "Sharkman Loop," being directionally challenged and after a bit, he did pull in with no explanation as to where he had been......
After a discussion on generators with Hambone leading the talk and handing out beer, the Nation changed clothes and got ready to head to Players when Skittles realized he had locked himself out of his van! Rather than take a ride home to get another key, he decided to ride home on his single speed and get the key and ride back! He ended up with around 70 miles on the day! What a Stud Shark Minion!
The gang headed over to Players where Lava Girl and Yeti Girl were waiting with Wildman, who had joined for the party. Riders started piling in, as did Hoosier Boy, who had shown up late for the ride, but got one in anyway, making it 11 riders on the day.
Sasquatch and Fire also joined in for the party and to every ones joy, I Owe Beer bought the first round! Is this a great country or what?!?
Thanks, I Owe Beer, and a name change to I Bought Beer is being taken under consideration by the Cycling Commissioner!
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| "Cottage Cheese a dollar??? Gimmee fry's!" |
It was a great party and as the bills came around and everyone was asking about the first round, Zyckmann could be heard complaining about the $1 he was charged for his substitute cottage cheese.
A whole dollar?!!?
Cottage cheese? Who orders cottage cheese with their sandwich anyway?
Apparently the legend of cycling asked if he could substitute cottage cheese for the french fry's and the waitress said that he could.
However, there was apparently a $1 up charge that Fabio objected to. Oh, the humanity!!!
Other than that, it was a perfect afternoon of riding, drinking and eating!
Even cottage cheese! Oh, the humanity.....cottage cheese! Who eats that? Well, apparently ZYCKMANN does!
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| Toe even braided his beard for the ride! |
It has been a great season, and a great ending to what was a crazy last couple of weeks in the Nation.
Have a great winter and see you all in the spring!!!
BARRY ROUBAIX REPORT!!
Belo News
October 23, 2019
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| Reb, Nutjob, Yeti Boy, Gazelle Girl and Brewman! |
Hasting, Mi. - Gazelle Girl and her friend Nutjob, organized a mid week Barry Roubaix Ride through the legendary gravel roads of southwest Hastings and Yankee Springs on October 23.
They had a great turn out with Reb, Yeti Boy and Brewman joining the group for the ride and Sharkman and Lava Girl and some friends joining them at the Walldorff after doing a photo tour of the area.
They could not have picked a more beautiful fall afternoon to do the ride and though Nutjob started out at a torrid pace, the Shark Minions reeled him back in and settled into a more comfortable ride before ending up at the Waldorff for beer and food. Reb had to leave due to family obligations, but the rest of the party rocked. It was a great afternoon of riding, photo taking and partying!!!
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| The Walldorff was Rocking! |
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| Ah, Barry Roubaix in the fall! |
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| Last days of fall.........have a seat! |
IRONMAN AND KID DOSTER CHECK IN!
Belo News
October 25, 2019
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| Ironman and Kid Doster! Love the jersey, Ironman! |
Moab, Ut. - Many of the Shark Minions have asked how that legend of the peloton, Ironman, is doing out in Utah, as well as where in the heck has Kid Doster been?
You ask and Belo News delivers! Here is a report from the legend hizzelf, Ironman!
Take it away, Ironman:
"Well another year of Tour de Gull is almost in the books. It sounds like you had a successful year. I sure do miss those Saturday morning rides. Utah has a lot to offer, but I haven't found anything to compare to that ride.
Kid Doster was out here last weekend visiting and we had a great time. We woke up Saturday morning and it was cold and rainy, so what do you do when that happens? You load the bikes up and head to where it's sunny and 70. Moab, of course. I mean, doesn't everyone?
I hope this finds you both (he sent this to both Gazelle Girl and Belo News) well and the invitation is open you and all the Minions.
Have a great day."
After a brief email exchange with Ironman, and after commenting on his great jersey, he responded.......
"Gotta represent the mighty minion nation!
Maybe I could make a shameless plug for making the newsletter next week?"
Here it is Ironman, sorry we didn't get it in last week!
Hope to see you soon and have a great winter!!!
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