BIG TEN RULES COLLEGE GAME DAY!!!

The Big Ten rules!!!

RULE OF 15!!!

SHARKMAN ON THE PODIUM, AGAIN!??!

Eleven mighty Shark Minions at the start!!!

STYKER GUY AND EASTY KILLING IT OUT WEST!!!

SHARKMAN MISSING IN ACTION THIS WEEK?!?

OH, THE HUMANITY!!!

Belo News
September 8, 2019

Shark Cove, Mi. - As dawn broke late and dark over the Shark Cove, our intrepid hero, the Sharkman, had already thrown his legs over the edge of his shark bed and hit the floor running. He padded his way to the galley and started the coffee. He found himself in "perkatory."

This, of course, is the state that coffee addicts find themselves in when they wait for that first cup.......

Wishbone and Hermster ride in after a warm up
lap, like they rode it separately......

It was College Game Day and the old shark was excited to pull on his Badger Kit, with matching socks.  There was a bit of disappointment as he pulled on a vest and arm warmers AGAIN, and had to cover up the kit he so loves. But man, it has been a cold spring so far and he loves it!

Sharkman picked out a nice read dew rag for his very white head (he is, after all, a Great White) and padded his way back up the stairs from his Shark Bike Room in the basement to finish his coffee.

About 15 minutes before launch time, it was looking pretty dark outside, so Sharkman checked the radar and found it all clear. Amazingly, as the launch time approached, it started to lighten up considerably.

Maybe one more week at the this launch time?

Our hero knew it would be a small entourage this week, so he met Yeti Boy on the way out of the Cove and the two talked about how cool the starts had been this summer. There were a lot of puddles on the streets, and some very wet sections on the way over, indicating that there had been a lot of rain the night before.

Squeaky "styl'in" in his winter gear!

As they started their descent into the burg known as Galesburg, they saw Hermster doing his warm up lap with Wishbone on his wheel for the first time. Normally, Wishbone, that lover of koffee, was at the Klutch getting an early jolt of that brew the Nation all loves......but not today!

The parking lot at the start was completely empty, as Yeti headed to the restroom behind the school and Sharkman rode in solo. Shortly after, Hermster and Wishbone rode in from their warm up lap looking like they had ridden it separately.......

Riders began to trickle in as the sun made a weak attempt to come out from behind the thin layer of clouds.

Rocketman arrived and after getting his steed ready, rode up next to Hermster in his neon green kit, making it look like he and Hermster communicated on what kit to wear on the day. However, neither was in College Game Day kit.

Squeaky arrived, again looking like he was heading out on a polar expedition and immediately began his "pre-ride yoga" kata.....

Soon, The Sweetheart of the Peloton rode in with this weeks "Other Guy" being Toesetter, with the almost sun on her shoulder.

"Sqeaky Yoga!"
But with all those cloths, can he get up???

A virgin Minion rode in and Sharkman introduced himself. He said his name was Rob, and Sharkman asked if he had a nick name, to which he responded "Sharkman." Funny.......

When asked how he found out about the Nation he commented that his daughter had noticed an "errant" group of cyclists riding around the lake on Saturday morning and mentioned he may want to ride with them. Funny again.....so Gazelle Girl named him "Smart Ass." Later that day, he sent a note to Sharkman to get on the distribution and signed it "Smart Arse" and thus a name was declared.

Welcome to the mighty Shark Minion Nation, Smart Arse! You will fit right in with this group!

The total number of College Game Day kit was only 2, with only Sharkman in his Wisconsin kit and Greyhound in his Michigan Kit. This was less than 20% of the Nation!? What the......? What happened? No MSU, no Western Michigan, no Kalamazoo College or Purdue?

Wait.....what?!?

Toesetter & Gazelle Girl arrive!

Sharkman counted 11 Minions (well, 10 and 1 virgin Minion) making the start photo extremely important, as he did not believe 5 more riders would be jumping on so he would need to remember names. However, he once again, was wrong.

After introducing Smart Arse to the group and with the sun still trying to break through the clouds, Sharkman clicked in and he began to pull the train out of the station and into the metro center of Galesburg, where the Nation had to wait out the light while the Koffee Klutch early crew waved and took a count for Andrew.

Riders already began to jump on at the turn, one being J-Dog right at the Klutch and Falcon as the Nation headed north.

J-Dog and Falcon again, made Sharkman work WAY too hard for the sprint, taking him up over 24 mph to his "victory for America.

Sharkman had trouble getting the count at the first G Ave. Crossing, as PJ also jumped on. Now they were "approximately" 14.......

The Sweetheart of the Peloton!

The pace picked up in the run up to the col de Twin Lakes as the sun began breaking out of the sky and lighting up the two lakes nicely as the Nation glided by, complaining of the hardest hill on the KK-TdG course.

The Nation gathered at the Rt. 89 crossing to wait for the light, then headed into, what has become, the fastest section of the ride.

Past the Yorkville Church, Kellogg Korner, and the Kountry Klub sections, the Nation again jockeyed for position as the speed picked up and splintered the smaller than usual  peloton.

After the traditional "sit up" after the Kountry Club turn, the Nation bore down and waited for Hermsters early move, which was reeled in quickly this week, and Falcon took a major pull to open a gap.

So major that the Sharkman came up and stated, "I'll block for you! After that pull it is all yours!" To which he responded, "You take it!"

Though surprised, the old shark never misses a chance to take a sprint figuring that at age 70 there are only a few left in those tiny shark legs, so he charged ahead uncontested to capture the sprint.

At the top of col de Norte, that legend of the Peloton, Bissell Boy, jumped on decked out in MSU kit! Is this a great country or what!?! The Nation was now at 15 riders!!!

Did someone say, "Wear green neon kit?"

The speed again picked up, as everyone seemed to want the Food Stop Sprint and the Nation blew apart in the Holy Rollers as the Minions looked like flies climbing a wall as they all tried to get to the front!

J-Dog came out of no where to grab the coveted prize as the Nation formed up again to take the low road to the Inlet, while discussing whether to go clockwise or counter clockwise on the pace line in the run up to the GGG Spot Sprint. Bob the Builder also joined on giving the Nation 16 riders on the day and securing the rule of 15 that Sharkman did not need to remember names!

YES!

After a quick crossing at the Digital Divide, the pace line attempted to form up, yet again. Though not a thing of beauty, a "sort of" pace line formed and the riders got the speeds up to over 20 mph for periods of time as riders tried to adjust.

Gazelle Girl again, formed up her lead out team and they took her to yet another victory for America as she took her GGG Spot Sprint.

Virgin Minion, Smart Arse!
Welcome to the mighty Minion Nation!

At the Stop Sign, after the sprint, Sharkman noticed J-Dog pulling off his arm warmers and thought to himself, "he's smelling blood in the water" for the next sprint.

Sharkman was unsure if he knew about Hermsters usual early move or not, but he looked like he was ready to rock it as the Nation crossed over G and headed south to the finish.

Hermster made his move early and Falcon covered the break immediately, with Greyhound and Yeti Boy on his wheel, followed by the usual cast of thousands. The two riders pulled the Nation at a fast clip all the way to the final ascent to the finish.

Hermster pealed off on the hill, while Falcon fought at the front, as others who had enjoyed his pull to this point, began to pass him.  Falcon did make a second wind come back and Sharkman jumped on his wheel (and anyone's wheel he could grab, particularly Greyhounds......it is like being behind the Star Ship Enterprise!) as the horde of riders came down on the final stretch.

As the done hill finish stretched before the Nation, J-Dog went out with Boatman on his wheel, along with Minions looking to move up on the days ranking.

As J-Dog took a big lead, Sharkman saw a chance to catch Boatman, who was backing off, and kicked it up enough to catch him just before the finish and secure the second podium spot, with Boatman on his wheel, taking the last podium spot.

Bob the Builder joined for the last
part of the ride and Koffee!

It was a victory for America!

The tofosi and paparazzi went wild on the Champs le Galesburg as their hero's headed to the Press Conference at the Klutch, where Greyhound ran in to through down his plastic, securing koffee for everyone! Is this a great country or what!?!

Floyd was also at the Klutch and joined in on the festivities!

The frivolity went on for some time at the Klutch and the koffee flowed so much it caused Sharkman and Yeti Boy to get home a bit late, but both decided it was well worth it.

It was a great day to be in the Shark Minion Nation!

You won't want to miss this week's edition, though unfortunately, Sharkman will miss it, as he has In-Laws coming in for the weekend.

Since the old Shark doesn't want to be forgotten, he has declared it Shark Minion Jersey Day and hopes to see a lot of photos!

Thanks for the koffee, Greyhound!

Saturday, September 14, 2019

Shark Minion Jersey Day!

Launch Time - 8:00 a.m. - SHARP!

Be there!









STYKER GUY AND EASTY KILLING IT OUT WEST!!!

Stryker Guy is living large!!!

Belo News
September 10, 2019

Somewhere, Mt. - If you haven't been following that legend of the peloton, Stryker Guy, along with his side kick, Easty, you're missing one hell of a yarn, Bunkie!

We included the link to Styker Guys blog when SG headed out for his Boarder to Boarder Odyssey (Canada to Mexico on the Continental Divide) when he started but we've had additional requests, as his write ups have caused quite a "buzz" in the cycling world.

You can read all about the adventure (they are about half way now) at the link below.

Drop our hero's a line in the comment section! They are rocking it and making the Nation proud!!!

https://slowoldnstupid.wordpress.com/

Safe travels, Stryker Guy and Easty!!!

Somewhere in Montana!

Riders joining the Minion rides acknowledge the inherent risk involved with bicycle riding and by joining any Minion ride hold harmless any rider involved.