WHERE IN THE WORLD WAS REB?!?
KISSES FOR BREWMAN?
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| Sharkman, Zyckmann & Brewman in his Spartan Hat, ready to ride?!? |
IN LIEU OF ICEMAN RIDE/PARTY THIS SATURDAY!
END OF THE 30TH ANNIVERSARY YEAR! OH, THE HUMANITY!
"I WANT MY HEAD PHOTOSHOPPED!"
Belo News,
October 27, 2018
Shark Cove, Mi. - Our intrepid hero, the Sharkman, bound out of his shark bed, WAY before dawn broke over the Shark Cove on a damp, cool morning.
The Nation was moving to Fort Custer this week and our hero was, to say the least, excited for the change. He had not been on his mountain bike since July, when he crashed on the Demon Drop, which was just 6 weeks after his crash that sent him for X-Rays and caused him to miss a Saturday.
He was, however, undeterred!
As the green hue of the shark radar screen gleamed off his shark coffee cup at 6 a.m. it was looking like the rain was passing and he began to get excited.
Reb had texted him the previous evening telling him he was going to drive to the Trail Head, then ride to the Klutch for koffee, then ride back to the trail head to ride with the Nation but had to leave early for work.
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| Sort of lonely for Sharkman until Brewman arrived looking for his kisses! |
He ended the text message by stating the Shark should let him know if the ride would be called off because of the predicted rain.
Sharkman thought that if he let Reb know before 7 a.m. there would be enough time to head him off before he had to leave. So he had to be up early!
However, Sharkman turned on the weather channel and it was reporting rain, which our hero was not seeing on his radar app.
So he went outside to check and it was in fact, raining. Oh, the humanity.
Sharkman texted Reb to ask what he thought, but there was no answer. "Had he left already?" thought the Sharkman.
He then emailed Gazelle Girl to get the report that it was also raining in Galesburg.
Sharkman and Gazelle Girl then had several text exchanges with Reb, but to no avail. Reb had gone dark.......
Sharkman, worried that Reb had launched to the Fort already and thought he should go to the Klutch to see if anyone would show. Meanwhile, Gazelle Girl was smart enough to inform our hero that she was going to pour another cup of coffee, get a book, and wait to hear from the old Shark.
Sharkman loaded up the Shark-Vibemobile (which is now 16 years old with 150,000 miles) with his 9er and headed over to the Klutch in the constant drizzle. He was pretty sure there would be no ride.
Sharkman walked into the Klutch to shouts of "Hello!" from the early morning Koffee Group! He was peppered with questions like, "are you guys really riding today?" and "why would anyone want to ride in the rain?" and "How did you get your name?"
After staving off the paparazzi, Sharkman sent, yet another text, to Gazelle Girl and Reb reporting he had taken up position at the Klutch, awaiting Rebs wet arrival. In the mean time he got a text from Brewman.
"Brewman here, are you riding?"
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| Zyckmann and Brewman on their high tech rides! Is this a great country or wha?!? |
Sharkman explained the situation and ended the text, with what he thought, were a bunch of periods indicating the uncertainty of a ride. However, with his fat dorsal he punched in a couple x's. Embarrassed, he immediately realized his error and re-texted, but the auto correct would change the xx's to cc's! He tried again and again, got cc's! Brewman didn't respond and Sharkman was worried what the legendary rider was thinking?!?
As Sharkman awaited Reb's arrival or text (he wasn't sure which was going to happen), Gazelle Girl texted offering Sharkman to come out to the Triple Nasty Ranchero for a ride, but Sharkman had pretty much convinced himself that he wasn't riding because the rain was still coming down.
Then Brewman walked in dressed to ride! Or looking for kisses, the Editors are still not sure.......
It was about this time that Reb finally picked up his phone to report that he had been dealing with a sick kid and never left the house! Oh, the humanity!
Sharkman and Brewman sat there discussing what to do, when Sharkman said he better go to the Trail Head and see if anyone was crazy enough show up. Brewman said he would go with and if it stopped raining, might ride and see how the trails were. He was WAY more enthusiastic than our hero!
As the Shark watched the beads of rain whisking off his Shark-Vibemobile windshield (he uses Rainex) on the ride over, he was convincing himself he wasn't going to ride.
When he and Brewman pulled into the Trail Head Parking Lot, there was Zyckmann with his bike already unloaded and leaning against his Land Rover, ready to ride!
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| Red Loop in reverse and the "Sharkman Loop!" |
When Sharkman got out of the car, it wasn't raining and both he and Brewman got motivated by Zyckmann enthusiasm, so they decided to try the trails out and see how they were, as riders were coming in and and reporting them in pretty good shape.
With Zyckmann in the lead, and Sharkman protecting the rear, the three riders struck out on the Red in reverse.
The three rode the Red, then Sharkman led the group on the "Sharkman Loop," a combination of the Red Crazy Beaver, the start of the Green, and the Red Trenches.
It never rained as they rode, the track was firm with no puddles, and the temps made for a comfortable ride. That's Michigan! You just never know and as they say, "there is no bad weather, just bad gear!"
The three celebrated in the parking lot and talked about the "In Leiu of Iceman" Ride/Party next Saturday! (See next story).
It was a great morning on the trails! You won't want to miss next weeks ride/party at the Fort and at Players!
Be there!
IN LIEU OF ICEMAN RIDE/PARTY THIS SATURDAY!
Belo News
November 3, 2018
Augusta, Mi. - This Saturday is the "In Leiu of Iceman Ride/Party" at the Fort.
For those of you not taking part in the Iceman, which seems to be a larger number each year, the mighty Shark Minion Nation with meet at 2:00 p.m. at the Fort Custer Trail Head for a group (or two groups) ride around the Fort. Riders may wish to bring a beverage of choice for the post ride at the Trail Head.
The riders will then go to Players in Augusta for post ride drinks and dinner at 4:00 p.m.
Spouses, significant others, family, etc. are invited as well to help the Nation celebrate the end of the 30th Shark Minion Season!
Those Shark Minions that do not ride mountain bike are also invited to Players at 4:00 p.m. and we hope for a great turn out!
This is always a fun event so come on out with your guest to help celebrate the close of another fantastic season on the bike!
ANGRY SUBSCRIBER CHASTISED!?!
Belo News
October 25, 2018
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| Let that be a lesson to you! |
More specifically, the subscriber felt that the veteran reporter, Gazelle Girl, had far too much time on her hands to be able to Photoshop riders heads on bikes.
It was apparent from the "tone" of the letter that the real issue was that the subscriber had never had his head photoshopped, and was feeling left out. So Gazelle Girl took care of it immediately.
The subscriber shall go nameless, per Belo News confidentiality policy, but we all thought the photo came out well!
The subscriber was chastised by the Editor for having too much time on his hands for writing the email in the first place and was reminded that Reporter, Gazelle Girl, is a member of "The Lucky Ones" retiree group and thus, has plenty of time, as does the Editor of Belo News!
