MINION NATION RULES ICEMAN!

Early Wave at the Iceman Cometh takes off!

BEER POWERED?

ANOTHER PEAK2PEAK WINNER? OH, YES!

HOOSIER BOY IN NEW YORK, NEW YORK!

Belo News

November 2, 2013

Kalkaska, Mi. - As dawn broke over the Shark Cove, our intrepid hero, the Sharkman, was not there!

Oh, the humanity!

"Where was our hero?" you ask?  

Hot Coffee at Mickey D's!

Motoring his way to the start of this years Iceman Cometh along with expedition leader, Bissell Boy,  Zickman and Stryker Guy.  These four hardy Minions were contemplating their strategies as they dropped a car off at the finish and then drove to the start wondering what they may have forgotten in the car they had just dropped off.

The previous evening, after attending the Expo, getting their packets, signing autographs, saying hello to many of the Minions in attendance like Danimal, Gazelle Girl, the Cannon (who was posing with Emily Batty, Trek Racer, Brian, MC Hammer, Chumbly), etc. the foursome headed back to their Condo to pour over weather maps and plan an assault on dinner.  The big questions were, "would it rain on race day?" - "what gear should be brought along?" - "and what wine pairs well with Pork Ravioli?"

Bissell Boy had arranged for fantastic accomodations, and had organized the entire weekend like the inner works of a fine Swiss watch.

Of course, in the case of Zickman, it was "what beer should I fill my Camelback with for the Iceman?"  

Yes, you heard that right Bunkie!

When morning did break, there was a light rain in the air and it wasn't looking good for the Nation. 

Sharkman, "I"ll drink to that!" Is it us
or does Sharkman's nose look big?

However, as the intrepid group of riders headed out, the rain slowly began to recede and though the sun threatened to show up at times, it never made a full debut on the day but it never rained either!

Hallelujah!  

Strategy for this years race had reached a new level of contemplation as the riders approached Kalkaska, where the race would begin.

Due to their strong finishes the previous year, Zickman (who some may remember raced without a saddle in 2012 and this year was experimenting with a Camelback full of beer - what will he do in 2014?) and Bissell Boy, had early seedings, starting around 9:30, while Sharkman and Stryker Guy were not due to launch until Wave 39 at 10:54 a.m.  Almost an hour and a half wait and actually 2 hours after arriving in Kalkaska.

After Zickman, who looked very happy as he passed in the first wave, sipping on his Camelback, and Bissell Boy who waved as he went by, launched, Styker Guy and Sharkman looked at each other and decided to go to McDonald's for a coffee.

Stryker Guy waiting for his wave to go off!

As it turns out, the McDonald's in Kalkaska not only has great coffee and a clean bathroom with heat, but also sports a fireplace!  Is this a great country or what?!? (We hope posting this won't make it "the" place to be next year....)

As the time ticked away to the 39th wave, Stryker Guy and Sharkman were enjoying the ambiance of the Kalkaska Mickey D's, sipping coffee, going to the head at will (which can be often) and warming their feet by the fireplace.

However, as the clock clicked closer to the appointed launch, the two Minions saddled up and headed to the start line where they found Yeti Boy in the wave ahead of them, signing autographs and mugging for the crowd.

The weather had warmed and was hovering at around 41 degrees as the clock ticket down and they heard, "5, 4, 3, 2, 1 and wave 39 is off!"

For the most part, the entire race was somewhat of a blur for our hero, as he felt strong, felt he had

The Cannon with Emily Batty. Lucky dude.......

dressed appropriately, and pondered why he too, did not fill his Camelback with beer……oh, the humanity!

The course seemed to be very quick this year and instead of ruining the route, the previous rains seemed to make the course faster, the sand more packed and the route did not seem to have the "bottlenecks" of the previous year.  Though it was slow going in the single track spots, riders were much better about allowing others to pass and kept the pace going as best they could considering the crowds. There were some major water puddles along the route, some as big a 15-20 feet wide and riders developed paths around them.  However, in some cases riders scrambled to be first into these "paths" and if they lost, some had to go through the water and in some cases went down in it. One rider stated he was shocked by not only the

Cannons autographed number! Lucky Dude....

cold of the water, but how deep the puddles were!

Near the end, going up hills, riders were scattered like injured and wounded on a battle field.  As Sharkman climbed "Anita Hill" on rider was cramping up bad and crawling on his knees trying to stand.

The finish was a bit masochistic as it brought riders right to the finish, then took them out for the last kilometer.  After riding through a tunnel that appeared to be a buried truck trailer, the riders circled in some silly single track, to a hill climb to riding over the buried truck trailer to the finish.

Sharkman, who did not look at his watch the entire ride, felt strong and thought he was on pace for a

Emily Batty finishing. Photo supplied by
the Cannon. Lucky Dude.....though he was getting close
to being considered for stalking the racer.......

PR and was somewhat disappointed that he had finished 4 minutes off his best time in 2011.  However, he later learned the course was around a mile to a mile and a half longer and then felt somewhat better about his result.  Yeti Boy and Stryker Guy finished with our hero and Zickman was waiting to take the riders back to the car to change into warmer clothes and get down to the drinking of adult beverages. While Bissell Boy had left to pick up the car at the start, Styker Guy and Sharkman quickly changed so that they could go in search of food and drink.

Again, the way to get beer at the Iceman is that you have to wait in line to buy tickets so that you can wait in line to then purchase the Bells Beer with the ticket.  Oh, the humanity.

So while Sharkman waiting in line to purchase the ticket, then the beer, Styker Guy went in search of the food. 

Zickman denying to Race Officials
that he had a controlled substance in
his Camelback!

A Sharkman, Iceman tradition is the Mac & Cheese from Firefly.  Sharkman needs his comfort food after a big race and feels there is nothing quite like Mac & Cheese washed down with a Bells' Amber Ale! Is this a great country or what!?!  Meanwhile, Stryker Guy decided on the Polish sausage and fries combo as he sipped his Bell's.

Sharkman searched the grounds for other Minions and though he did run across the Cannon, Danimal, MC Hammer and Chumbly, he was unable to find Gazelle Girl, who he had seen launching earlier on her tandem with Richard Neuman.  Sharkman lamented that a late wave meant many of the riders who finished early had left or were lost in the crowds.

While Bissell Boy and Zickman headed out to visit the Hagerty Car Collection, Stryker Guy and Sharkman went in search of free beer at the Team Taylor Campsite.  They were not disappointed as they found the Team Taylor contingent surrounding their campfire, handing out hot dogs and cans of beer! Oh, yes!  Good ole Team Taylor……

After a few brews, team photos, and more autographs signed, Stryker Guy and Sharkman headed back to their condo to watch the MSU/Michigan game.

They were later joined by Yeti Boy, Reb, Hambone and a possible new Minion named Dave for a post

Zickman, Sharkman and Styker Guy at the finish!

ride drink and the watching of the big game.  The Team Taylor guys also stopped by but emailed the group that they were in the lobby but no one was checking their email and they missed them.

The results of Minion riders can be checked at the Iceman Cometh website, but briefly;

Danimal turned in a stunning ride on his fat tire bike!

Both the Cannon and the Falcon turned in amazing times, with the Cannon edging out the Falcon in their grudge match!

Wrongway, and Rainman who actually was going to ride in the rain if it rained, both finished with outstanding times!

Buick, Stryker Guy, DPS & Kia Pet!

Team Taylor Crew with Sharkman & Stryker Guy.

Brewman not only turned in an outstanding time, but did it without "touching" (putting his feet down) for the entire race! That means he did not walk any of the hills! Oh, the humanity!

Yeti Boy, Reb and Hambone and their new buddy Dave all had great times!

Polar Bear was there and was reported as having a great ride!

Gazelle Girl and Richard Neuman (who build our hero, the Sharkman's Litespeed) had a fantastic tandem ride.  How they do that is beyond comprehension!

Oh, the humanity!

Nickhead, Iceman, Bounty Hunter, Kia Pet, DPS, Buick, Doctor and the entire Team Taylor crew had their usual spectacular ride!

(Editors Note - we apologize if we missed anyone or didn't post a photo that was submitted, but there were a lot of riders AND photos!)

Thanks to all those Minions who submitted photos!

The Iceman was a great way to finish the season!  

Stay tuned for periodic rides at the Fort or Cross Country ski outings this winter!

Bounty Hunter, Iceman & Nickhead enjoying a beer.

Bounty Hunter, Sharkman & Nickhead!

ANOTHER MINION WINNER AT PEAK2PEAK!

Nickhead takes honors!

Belo News

October 19, 2013

Crystal Mountain, Mi. - Last week we reported the exploits of Polar Bear and Baby Bear at the Peak2Peak race in Crystal Mountain.  Right after Belo News went to press, it was learned that our own Minion and Team Taylor favorite, Nickhead had won his age group at the same race!

Oh, the humanity!

Belo News wanted to make sure the Nation was aware that Nickhead did the Nation proud, taking the first place in his division! Great job Nickhead!

HOOSIER BOY TAKES NEW YORK BY STORM!

Belo News

November 3, 2013

Hoosier Boy, pre marathon! No, we have no
idea what he has on his nose.....

New York, NY. - While the Iceman was winding down, Hoosier Boy was winding up to do the New York Marathon.  This regular Minion, who would have normally been at the Iceman, had decided to run the New York City Marathon (what was he thinking?).  Actually, Hoosier Boy is a very accomplished marathon runner and had decided that he wanted to run this famous race at least once in his life time and this was the year.

Fortunately for him, he was able to score a ticket to the United Airlines "First Class Lounge" at the start of the race.  Due to security and other concerns, runners are required to be at the start almost three hours before the gun goes off to start the race.  For most, this means waiting in the cold, much like at the Iceman.  However, by scoring the tickets, Hoosier Boy was able to enjoy a pre-race reading of the paper with his beloved kup of joe! Duncan Donuts no less.

Is this a great country or what!

Hoosier Boy turned in a great race, making the Nation proud and was back in the office by Monday morning! What a stud!